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LADY RUM-DI-DOODLE-DUM’S 
CHILDREN 



Jolin and Mary leaned forward and saw in tlie 
glass Imndreds of lovely colors. (Page 126 .) 








LADY 

RUM-DI-DOODLE-DUM’S 

CHILDREN 


BY 

S. B. DINKELSPIEL 

Which is Dedicated to My M other y Your Mother 
arid Lady Rvm-Di-Doodle-Dwm, Who is the 
Mother of all the Bald-Headed, Pug-Nosed Little 
Baby Creatures m the World, and to the Child- 
Person for whom Lady Rum-Di-Doodle-Dum 
wmked one evening when 1 ashed her to do so. 



New York 

Desmond FitzGerald, Inc. 


PZ-7 
,11 


Copyright, 1914, by 
Desmond FitzGerald, Ino. 


OCT 23‘i9f5i 

©CI.A388021 




PREFACE 


(to be read) 

The Dictionary says that a Preface is some- 
thing spoken before. Usually it gives the author 
an opportunity to talk about himself. Some 
authors talk very much, especially about them- 
selves, in their Preface. Mr. George Bernard 
Shaw writes more Preface than Book, and Theo- 
phile Gautier simply uses the Book as an excuse 
for the Preface. But you do not need to worry, 
as you will not read either of them for a very 
long time. 

My Preface is going to be different. It is 
about something that comes at the end and not 
the beginning; furthermore, I am not going to 
talk about myself. 

Of course you do not know what in the world 
I am driving at; I will come at once to the point. 
I had all but finished the stories of Lady Rum- 
didoodledum’s children when I received the fol- 
lowing letter. I have a pretty good idea that 
“ L. H. D.” is no other than the Child-Person 
for whom Lady Rumdidoodledum winked. 

V 


VI 


PREFACE 


“ Me. S. B. Dinkelspiel, 

“Dear Sie, 

“ I have the honor to inform you that Mrs. 
Sherman is the mother of a lovely new baby 
daughter, born this evening. She is to be chris- 
tened ‘ Margaret,’ but will be known to her friends 
(of whom I trust you will be among the number) 
as ‘ Midge.’ Liza and Martha Mary are delighted 
over the new arrival — the boys have not yet seen 
the little lady. 

“ Hoping that she will prove as welcome to you 
as to the rest of her very devoted family, I am, 
sir, 

‘‘ Your very obedient servant and humble 
collaborator, 

L. H. D.” 

The Planet Venus. 

A day or so later, a thick envelope came 
through the mail for me. 

“ Is it,” said I to myself, “ another of my stories 
rejected by a heartless editor?” 

It was not! It was the story of “ Midge,” writ- 
ten by “ L. H. D.,” and it came just in time, for 
I had been having a miserable hour seeking a 
last chapter for the book, and here one fell — 
I might say — out of the sunny sky. 

S. B. Dinkelspiel. 


San Francisco, Cal^ornia. 


CONTENTS 


CHAPTER 

I. IN WHICH WE MEET FLIP, ALTHOUGH HE WAS 
SUPPOSED TO BE A SECRET .. 

H. IN WHICH PETER SPILLS THE DEW OUT OF HIS 
POCKET AND IT CAUSES A GREAT DEAL OF 
BOTHER, BUT MR. SMITH, WHO IS THE KING 
OF FAIRIES, PUTS AN END TO THE TROUBLE 

HI. IN WHICH WE BEGIN TO REALIZE HOW CON- 
VENIENT IT IS TO HAVE A PERSON LIKE FLIP 
ABOUT THE PLACE, ESPECIALLY WHEN THERE 
IS NOTHING MUCH TO DO ; ALSO WE HEAR OF 
MR. MORIARITY AND THE FAIRY WHO DID NOT 

have' a red chin beard and a bald head 

IV. . IN WHICH MARTHA MARY INVADES THE CASTLE, 
AND FATHER PROVES THAT HE CAN DO OTHER 
THINGS BESIDES WRITING BUSINESS IN BIG 
BOOKS. ALSO SOMEONE ARRIVES . . 

V. IN WHICH FLIP TELLS MY FAVORITE STORY, AND 
IF YOU DO NOT LIKE IT VERY MUCH, FLIP 
KNOWS SOMEONE WHO WILL ., [. 

VI. IN WHICH EDWARD LEE AND WALTER GO ON THE 
WARPATH BECAUSE THEY DON’t KNOW WHAT 
ELSE TO DO, AND ON ACCOUNT OP THEM 
JOHN AND MARTHA MARY MISS HEARING THE 
IMELODRAMA .j ..... . 

vii 


PAGE 

1 

10 

19 

28 

40 

49 


viii CONTENTS 

CHAPTER 

VII. IN WHICH LIZA GOES UNDER THE SIDEBOARD; 

WALTER AND EDWARD LEE FIX THE CAT, AND 
FLIP PROVES THAT THE CITY FOGS ARE NICE 

Vm. IN WHICH MARTHA MARY HAS A WONDERFUL 
DAY AND LEARNS THE LOVELIEST OF SECRETS 
AND flip’s aspirations ARE EXPLAINED 

IX. IN WHICH IS TOLD THE STORY OF ALFRED OF 

THE LOW COUNTRY, AND JANICE, WHO LOVED 
THE queen’s page 

X. IN WHICH JANE STAYS LONGER THAN SHE HAD 

expected to and we entertain her. as 

USUAL, FLIP TELLS A STORY .... 

XI. IN WHICH WALTER DOES NOT WANT NINE 
EIGHTS TO BE SEVENTY-TWO ; AND l^IARTHA 
MARY FEELS SO BADLY FOR HIM THAT SHE 
GOES TO SEEK ADVENTURE. SHE FINDS IT . 

Xn. IN WHICH ANOTHER JOHN AND ANOTHER MARY 
WANDER FURTHER FROM HOME THAN THEY 
EVER HAVE BEEN BEFORE, AND FIND A MAR- 
VELOUS BALL OF GLASS, IN WHICH ONE SEES 
THE STRANGEST THINGS .... 

Xm. IN WHICH FLIP USES NEEDLESSLY LONG WORDS, 
BUT, TO WIN OUR GOOD-WILL AGAIN, HE 
TELLS A REAL OLD-FASHIONED FAIRY TALE . 

XIV. IN WHICH WINFRED IS GIVEN THE MOST WON- 
DERFUL WISH IN THE WORLD, AND I ADVISE 
YOU ALL TO READ IT AND LEARN WHAT IT IS, 


PAGE 

67 

76 

I 

85 

99 

110 

120 

133 


CONTENTS 

CHAPTER 

SO THAT IF, SOME DAY WHEN YOU ARE LEAST 
EXPECTING IT, A FAIRY COMES AND OFFERS 
YOU A WISH, YOU WILL KNOW FOR WHAT TO 

ASK •••••••• 

XV. IN WHICH, FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A LONG 
TIME, I DO NOT TALK AT ALL, BUT AM WELL 
CONTENT TO SIT QUIETLY BY AND LISTEN TO 
THE LOVELY NEWS THAT L. H. D., WHO, YOU 
WILL REMEMBER, I TOLD YOU ABOUT IN THE 
PREFACE, HAS BROUGHT .... 


ix 

PAGE 


155 


167 



CHAPTER I 


IN WHICH WE MEET FLIP, ALTHOUGH HE WAS SUP- 
POSED TO BE A SECRET 

Down on the edge of the Poppy Field there is a 
very large, wide lake; the largest lake you have ever 
seen. Of course there are deeper lakes across the 
mountains where you have never been, but Poppy 
Lake is quite deep enough. When you turn your 
back and lean down and look between your legs so 
that everything is upside-down, it looks still larger ; 
almost as big as the sky and just as blue. Right on 
the shore, tied to a willow tree, is a wonderful green 
boat with two oars when you wish to go exploring 
alone, and four if you intend to take a crew with 
you. 

John usually went alone, because crews never 
know their place and want to be Captain if they 
are men, or always talk about fairies and husbands 
and silly trifles if they are women. There is of 
course only one woman and she is Martha Mary; 


2 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


you see, Liza is only three years old and can’t 
really be caUed a woman. The fact is, John pre- 
fers traveling with Liza to any of the others. 
She respects John very much and will not mind 
anyone else — not even Nurse Huggins. John is 
quite a famous traveler; there have been times 
when he would sit at the helm of his good ship and 
Liza would sit on the deck on her legs and fold 
her arms and watch the Captain with very large, 
grey eyes. Then John would cough and bow to 
her and say in a voice almost as loud as Butcher 
lievy’s : 

“ Where does your Ladyship desire to sail 
to-day? ” 

Liza would say, “ Yes,” which is not an answer 
at all. 

Then John would pick up the oars and row with 
all his might, just as though the ship were not 
tied to the willow tree. Right into the ocean they 
would go. Sometimes they could travel almost 
as far as England before Nurse Huggins called 
them to come to tea. Nurse Huggins always 
called just as they were about to get some- 
where. 


WE MEET FLIP 


3 


Martha Mary thought it silly for John to play 
with Liza so much; you see, John was at least 
twelve and Martha Mary was ten, so they were 
much more fitted for each other than John and 
Liza. So Martha Mary would come down to the 
Lake and call to J ohn and he would put his hands 
to his ears and shout: 

“ I can’t hear you. I’m miles and miles 
away.” 

Then Martha Mary would stamp her foot, and 
go away to find Edward Lee Sherman, who was 
seven years old and her youngest brother, and 
Walter, who was eight and almost Edward’s twin. 
You see, the Sherman family was quite a large 
one; first, there was John and then Martha Mary; 
then Walter and Edward Lee, and then Liza. 
But that wasn’t all. Nurse Huggins was a very 
important member of the family, and there was 
Agnes, the cook, and Dawson, the gardener, and 
Mother Dear, who looked almost like a girl her- 
self, sometimes, and Father, who was terribly old 
and had brown whiskers and the softest grey eyes, 
just like Liza’s. And I almost forgot Hermit. 
He was the huge St. Bernard and next to Mother 


4 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


Dear, the most important member of the house- 
hold. No one knew just how old Hermit was. 
But Captain John was quite sure that the very 
first thing he heard when he opened his eyes in 
this world was Hermit’s welcoming bark. That 
was twelve years ago, and twelve is old for a 
dog. 

And — there was one other. He was supposed 
to be a secret, but I never could keep a secret 
and, as long as I have told about Hermit and 
Hermit found him, I might as well tell. He was 
Flip. That wasn’t his real name, but Liza could 
not say Philip, so she called him Flip. And after 
a while everyone else did, too. This is the way 
we found him. You see. Hermit did not come 
home for dinner one night and everyone was very 
much frightened. They went all over the poppy 
field calling him, but he didn’t come. It grew 
so late that the stars came out, so Mother Dear 
put Liza and Edward Lee to bed. She was very 
quiet and not at all smily when she tucked them 
in, because she was worried about Hermit. For 
hours and hours John and Father and Gardener 
Dawson hunted with yellow lanterns; they called 


WE MEET FLIP 5 

and whistled, but Hermit did not come. So 
they went to bed, and Father said; 

“ Leave the old boy alone. He is sure to come 
back.” 

Father always did know everything! 

The first thing next morning, all the family 
hurried out to the garden, but there was no Her- 
mit. Father went East and John went West 
and all the others scattered in different direc- 
tions, leaving Liza all alone to take care of Mother 
Dear. But Mother Dear was not at all good 
company; she wouldn’t crawl on the floor and 
she wouldn’t smile, so Liza slipped away, very 
unhappy. She took her Nigger Doll, Samuel, 
and walked way, way off, down into the Lily 
Place where the frogs live. And right there, 
perfectly happy and grinning, was Hermit — all 
muddy and with his tongue hanging out as though 
he had been running and was out of breath. Next 
to him, sprawled out on the grass, with one foot 
stuck up in the air and a cap on his toe, was a 
man and he was talking to Hermit. Liza did not 
pay any attention to him; she just jumped on 
Hermit’s back and rubbed her face in his 


6 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

neck. The man was very much surprised. He 
sat up, brushed the dirt off of his trousers, and 
said: 

“ Good morning.” 

Liza laughed at him and pulled Hermit’s tail. 

“ I said ‘ Good morning,’ ” said the man. 
“ Can’t you talk? ” 

That sort of frightened Liza, so she jumped up 
and ran off to find John, with Hermit bounding 
after her. Just then John came through the trees, 
followed by Edward Lee and Walter and Martha 
Mary. They hugged Hermit to show how glad 
they were to see him, and then Liza took them 
to the new man. 

“Hullo!” he said. “Are you the whole fam- 

ay?” 

“ We are the Shermans,” said John. 

“ Yes,” said Edward Lee, “ and we wish you 
would go away so that we could play.” 

“Edward Lee!” Martha Mary whispered. 
“ You mustn’t be impolite.” 

The man laughed. “ Please,” said he, “ may I 
play, too?” 

“ You are too old,” said Walter. 


WE MEET FLIP 


7 


“ No, I’m not.” 

John did not mean to have any unfairness. 
‘‘How old are you?” he asked. 

The man held his fingers to his lips. “ It’s a 
secret. Folks say I’m twenty-three,” he said. 
“ But they really don’t know. The fact is I’m 
only twelve.” 

“ Swear it and hope to die? ” demanded John. 

“ I swear.” 

“ And hope to die? ” 

“Do I have to?” 

“ No,” said Martha Mary. “ If you want to be 
twelve, we will let you. Please, what can you 
play?’’ 

“ Everything.” 

“That is lovely,” said Martha Mary. “We’ll 
play ‘ Robinhood.’ ” 

“And I’ll be Robinhood,” said John. 

“ And I’ll be Little John,” said Walter. 

“ I’m Little John,” said Edward Lee. 

“ You’re not. I am.” 

“ All right,” said Edward Lee. “ Then I don’t 
want to play.” 

The man frowned. “ See here,” he said. “ You 


8 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

can’t both be Little John. Suppose we play 
something else. Suppose I tell you a story.” 

“Do you know any?” Martha Mary asked. 

“ Dozens of them.” 

“ How nice! I think I shall like you. What is 
your name?” 

“ Philip.” 

“ Flip,” said Liza, and that is how he got his 
name. 

Meanwhile Mother Dear had joined Father. 
They hunted high and low for Hermit and for 
the children, too, for by this time Mother was 
growing really and truly frightened. All of a 
sudden they heard Edward Lee laughing. To 
the Lily Place they ran, and there — through the 
trees — guess what they saw! There was Flip 
leaning against a fat old oak tree, with one leg 
up in the air and his cap on his toe. Liza was sit- 
ting on the knee of the leg that wasn’t up in the 
air, while Martha Mary was lying on the ground 
on her stomach, weaving buttercups. John and 
Walter were sitting up in the tree; Edward Lee 
was on Hermit’s back, and Flip was telling his 


WE MEET FLIP 


9 


story. So Mother Dear sat down very quietly 
and pulled Father after her. She leaned against 
his shoulder and closed her eyes, while Father 
smoothed her hair. And they listened to the 
story, too, and this was it: 


CHAPTER II 


IN WHICH PETER SPILLS THE DEW OUT OF HIS 
POCKET AND IT CAUSES A GREAT DEAL OF 
BOTHER, BUT MR. SMITH, WHO IS THE KING OF 
FAIRIES, PUTS AN END TO THE TROUBLE 

“ Peter sat on a blade of wheat and swung 
backwards and forwards and up and down in the 
wind, till his feet were higher than his head and 
all the dewdrops spilled out of his pocket. I don’t 
suppose you have ever seen Peter. He is about 
this big — that is, as big as a red-headed match — 
and he has little thin wings made out of the fuzz 
that grows on the cowslips. Peter has red hair, 
too, just like the match, and he is freckled, but 
one can never see the freckles because they are 
so small. In ways, Peter is a very wonderful boy. 
You see, he can carry dewdrops in his pocket 
(when he doesn’t spill them) and he skips around 
the garden just before the stars go to bed put- 
ting a dewdrop on every flower, just as a mother 
10 


PETER SPILLS THE DEW 


11 


cat would bathe her kitten. Peter likes his work; 
he knew that every boy has to do something worth 
while, so he chose the work that was the most 
fun. Of course it is fun to bathe flowers. They 
look so bright and sunshiny when they have their 
drop of dew, just as your face does when Nurse 
What-do-you-call-her ” 

“ Nurse Huggins, please,” said Martha Mary. 

“ Nurse Huggins rubs soap on it and in your 
eyes. So on this particular May morning Peter 
sat on the piece of wavy wheat and waited for 
the biggest and loveliest Mother star, Mrs. Rum- 
didoodledum, to go away, so that he could go to 
work. 

“ Finally, when Mrs. Rumdidoodledum had 
gone to bed and the sky grew pink like the eyes 
of Fluffytail, the white rabbit, Rosemary, who 
was the queen of the flower fairies, came out and 
clapped her hands to set all the morning elves to 
work. First, Mr. James, the butler fairy, ap- 
peared and pulled all of the dark-cloud curtains 
out of the sky. Then a hundred and three golden 
fairies tied daisy ropes to the sun and pulled him 
up over the hill. Lastly Nurse Agnes, the fat- 


la LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

test fairy you ever saw, went around and opened 
all the flowers’ eyes. Then everyone stood still 
and waited for Peter to come down and wash 
them. Of course the stupid Peter couldn’t, be- 
cause he had swung too high and spilled all the 
dewdrops. At this. Queen Rosemary was ter- 
ribly angry — which wasn’t very bad, because the 
fairies have all been well trained and never lose 
their tempers. But she said Peter would have 
to be punished. What do you think Queen Rose- 
mary did? She led Peter down to the red rose- 
bush, tied him to it with a piece of green grass, 
and left him there for ever and ever so long. Next 
morning, when Nurse Agnes had opened all the 
flower children’s eyes, they waited for Peter to 
come and wash them, but he couldn’t, because he 
was tied up. The flower children were glad, be- 
cause they didn’t very much like to be washed, 
either; it was such a nuisance to get the dew- 
drops in their eyes and have them burn. You see, 
flower children are just as silly as other children 
when they are silly, and just as pretty and happy 
when they are bright. So they went without wash- 


PETER SPILLS THE DEW 


13 


ing all that day, and when Mr. James, the butler, 
pulled the cloud curtains into the sky that night 
the children were all tired and in bad humor, just 
like you when you are dirty. They didn’t sleep 
very well and they had queer dreams, and Midge, 
the violet baby, woke up and cried three times and 
kept everyone else awake. Then, the next morn- 
ing, when the hundred and three small wood 
sprites went to pull up the sun, he came up 
frowning. He looked at all the flower children 
and it spoiled his pleasure to see how dirty and 
cross they were. So he simply refused to shine 
at all, but went behind a miserable black cloud 
that Butler James had forgotten. There he 
sulked all day. When they had no sun to brighten 
them, the flower children all fell sick and faded; 
even sulphur and molasses would not help them, 
for in that way they were different from you. 
You see, things were in a very bad way in the 
flower garden. The flower children were so sickly 
that the bees would not come to them for honey, 
because it had become too thin. The sun hid away 
day after day and refused to shine and there were 
large black clouds that frightened everyone. The 


14 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

ground got hard and stiff and squeezed the flow- 
ers terribly. 

“ Then Rosemary became very much worried, 
because she had to keep the flower children well 
and at the same time punish Peter. So she 
thought and thought and could not make up 
her mind what to do. Then along came Mr. 
Smith. You know, of course, that Mr. Smith is 
the king of the fairies and he rides on the South- 
east Wind. He said to his wife: 

“ ‘ The flower children look very sickly and the 
sky is dark. What is the trouble, my dear? ’ 

“ She told him all the confusion she had had, 
but he laughed, because he was a man, and such 
things never bother men. He jumped on the 
Southeast Wind again and rushed up, up, right 
into the clouds and broke them to small pieces. 
Of course, when the clouds were all broken, the 
rain fell out of them and all over the flower chil- 
dren. And then — ^it was just like eating choco- 
late cake, it was so nice. The flower children 
were washed and became bright ; the sun came out 
because he was glad; the bees came buzzing 
around again, and all the world was happy. Then 


PETER SPILLS THE DEW 


15 


Queen Rosemary, on her throne in the sweetpeas, 
was pleased, so she forgave Peter for spilling the 
dewdrops. She told him, though, that whenever 
he was bad in the future she would tie him up, 
because she could count on the Southeast Wind 
to bring rain and do Peter’s work. 

“ And so you see, whenever the sky grows black 
and the flowers look sickly and the sun hides, 
you may know that Peter has been misbehaving 
and cannot wash the children. But you must not 
mind, because the rain is sure to come to do his 
work, and there is always sunshine after the 
rain.” 

When Flip had finished his story Mother Dear 
hugged Father and whispered, “ Who in the world 
is this wonderful boy?” 

She did not say it very loud, but Flip heard 
her and got up, with his cap in his hand, and 
almost spilled Liza. He bowed and said: 

“ It isn’t really wonderful. Stories like that 
always happen.” 

“Ridiculous!” said Father, in a very stern 
way. “ Who are you? Where did you come 
from? ” 


16 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

“ I’m Flip, Liza says,” was the answer, “ and 
so I must be.” 

“ Please, Mother Dear,” said Martha Mary. 
“ He is nice, and Liza found him. Do you think 
he might stay for tea? ” 

“ And tell more stories before bedtime,” said 
Walter. 

“ And he found Hermit,” said Liza. 

Mother Dear whispered something to Father 
that no one else heard. Then Father said: 

“ Children, go up to the house and wait for 
us. We will ask Flip if he will stay this even- 
ing.” 

The children went rather slowly, for they were 
anxious to hear what was going to happen. It 
must have been exciting, for ten minutes later 
Mother Dear came to the veranda smiling, and 
Flip’s eyes were all shiny, and Father was in the 
best of humor. 

“ Babes,” said Mother Dear, “ would you like 
Flip to stay here? ” 

“ All evening? ” asked Edward Lee. 

“No. Much longer. As long as he wishes to. 
Perhaps always.” 


PETER SPILLS THE DEW 


17 


You should have heard the children shout. 
They hugged Mother Dear and hugged F ather till 
his hair was all mussed and danced about Flip 
until he was all red; but Flip was easily embar- 
rassed. Finally Father said: 

“ Silence,” in an awesofne tone, and added: 
“ Philip is going to stay to work about the place 
and do chores and care for the flowers — ^and tell 
you stories when you are half-way good and he 
feels like it. So you had better be good.” 

Away went the children to tell the wonderful 
news to Nurse Huggins, all excepting Martha 
Mary, who was rather curious. 

“ Mother Dear,” she said. “ Please, who is 
Flip and how did you get Father to let him 
stay? ” 

“ Flip is a very fine boy,” said Mother, “ and 
he has aspirations.” 

“What are aspirations?” asked Martha Mary. 

“You explain to her. Father,” said Mother 
Dear. 

“Well, it is this way,” said Father. “As- 
pirations are like — like — ^now let me see — you 
know Oh! You tell her. Mother.” 


18 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

Why, it is simple, Dear,” said Mother. “ As- 
pirations Flip! Explain to Martha Mary 

what aspirations are.” 

But Fhp had followed the other children, to be 
introduced to Cook and Nurse Huggins, so 
Martha Mary did not find out for ages and ages 
why Flip had aspirations or what they were. 


CHAPTER III 


IN WHICH WE BEGIN TO REALIZE HOW CONVEN- 
IENT IT IS TO HAVE A PERSON LIKE FLIP ABOUT 
THE PLACE, ESPECIALLY WHEN THERE IS NOTH- 
ING MUCH TO do; also we hear OF MR. MORI- 
ARITY AND THE FAIRY WHO DID NOT HAVE A 
RED CHIN BEARD AND A BALD HEAD 

It was really quite surprising to learn how 
easily Flip could be depended upon. When it 
rained, Martha Mary would only need to say: 

“ Please, do you think we might have a story? ” 
And Flip would lead the way to the fireplace 
and, before you half knew it, you were in the 
' middle of a delightful story. Or Liza might 
tumble into the ash can and hurt her nose. She 
would cry dreadfully — and Flip would cure the 
damage with a story. John might go sailing on 
the lake Ocean and leave no cne to be Captain 
of the land army. Away the army — ^Martha 
Mary, Walter, Edward Lee, and Liza — would go 

19 


20 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

to Flip for sympathy — and Flip’s sympathy would 
be a story. Best of all were the stories he told 
in the Runaway Place where the poppies grew, 
lying on a small stack of hay, with his cap on his 
toe. There were so many told there that I hardly 
know which to tell to you first. Perhaps you 
would like the one about Mr. Moriarity. 

“ Of course you know,” said Flip, “ that every 
child has a fairy just as there is a fairy for 
every flower. But what I am going to tell you 
is much more surprising than that. Every 
grown-up, no matter how big or important he 
may be, has just as nice a fairy in charge of his 
affairs. The fairies of the grown-ups do not show 
themselves nearly as often as flowers or children 
fairies. You see, grown-ups have not the time 
to think of such things. Furthermore, they are 
usually- ashamed to recognize them, and of course 
the fairies are proud and will not go where they 
are not wanted. Would you believe that Father 
has a perfectly lovely fairy and there is another 
little, golden-winged one that belongs to Mother 
Dear? Well, there is! I have never seen them, 
but there must be. You see. Fairies are dreams. 


MR. MORIARITY AND THE FAIRY 21 

and everybody has dreams ; even Mr. Moriarity, the 
green grocer. 

“ Mr. Moriarity ’s fairy was the prettiest little 
fairy you have ever seen. Guess why? Because 
fairies do not take after their owners’ looks. If 
they did, Mr. Moriarity ’s fairy would have to be 
a little red-faced creature with a red chin beard 
and watery blue eyes and a bald head. But fairies 
take after their owners’ dreams, and this was Mr. 
Moriarity ’s dream: He wanted to be a great musi- 
cian and play music that would make all the world 
glad. He had always loved music; in the olden 
days in Kerry County, when he was no larger 
than John, he used to creep out of his bed at 
night, tiptoe into the barn, and hide in the straw 
to listen to Tim, his big brother, sing about a girl 
called Kathleen Mavourneen, and Peggy Machree, 
and The Low Back Car to the cows and pigs. 
The cows would moo and the pigs would squeal 
their applause, and then Mr. Moriarity, who was 
called Andy in those days, would tiptoe back 
to his blankets and hide his head and sing Peggy 
Machree in a tiny voice. It was not at all good 
music, but it made him feel good. So he dreamed 


^2 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


about the day that he should be a great musician 
and all the people would clap and the pigs squeal 
and the cows moo when he played. He wanted 
to play the violin because it sounds like the wind 
singing in the heather, but violins cost a great 
deal of money and lessons cost more, and Andy’s 
father was only a poor vegetable grower near 
the bogs. So it looked as though Andy would 
never be rich enough to have his dream. His fairy 
became unhappy and pale, because music fairies 
are the frailest, most delicate little things, and 
lovely melodies are sunshine for them. 

“ One day Andy was out in the heart of the 
moor listening to the wind in the purple heather 
and singing a song that he had made all him- 
self. His fairy was sitting on a wild rosebush lis- 
tening to the music. I know I have a perfectly 
awful voice, but this is the song he sang: 

“ ‘ The wild rose is my fairy love, my lady love, my pretty 
love. 

The wild rose is my fairy love and I don’t care who 
knows it. 

She dances for the moorland green, the Irish green, the 
hillside green, 

And smiles and smiles and smiles upon the breeze that 
blows it.’ 


MR. MORIARITY AND THE FAIRY 23 

‘‘ Now, what do you think happened as he sang? 
Across the moor came a large, fat man with a 
violin case under his arm, and a smile upon his 
face. He hid in the heather until Andy had 
stopped singing, then came out and sat down in 
front of him, and the big man and the small boy 
talked about music. Then the big man took out 
his brown old violin and put it to his chin and 
began to play. Andy leaned back and closed his 
eyes and discovered the strangest thing! He could 
see just as well with his eyes closed as with them 
open. And this is what he saw! First the heather 
commenced to quiver as though the breeze were 
blowing from all four sides; then the twigs parted 
and out came his own fairy, all dressed in brown 
and gold. She danced a skipping dance on the 
twigs, then stamped her tiny foot rather impa- 
tiently and clapped her hands. The twigs parted 
again and out came another fairy, a boy fairy, 
dressed in grey and gold, and he took her hand 
and they danced together. Then the boy fairy 
sang the very same song that Andy had sung, 
and down from the East Wind came a whole 
world of little fairies, all gold and silver, with 


M LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


spiderweb wings and dresses of every color. They 
danced here and there and everywhere, the wild- 
est, loveliest dance there ever was. Up and down 
and backwards and forwards, in circles and fairy 
rings they swung and then the heather began to 
sway and the wild rosebush to bend and the green 
grass to wave and all the fields danced to the fairy 
measure. Andy jumped up, threw his brown cap 
into the air, and crowed like a rooster. He folded 
his arms then and danced with them, a dance that 
was a jig and a hornpipe and a reel and a minuet 
all in one. The big man laughed as though he 
were ashamed and put away his violin and would 
play no more. But Andy told him how much he 
loved music, and what do you think? The wonder- 
ful man was so pleased that he told Andy to 
come to him every night and he should learn 
to play on the violin that was two hundred years 
old. Andy was so excited that he forgot to feed 
the pigs that night and hardly ate any bread 
himself. Off he skipped after dinner to the 
house across the moor for his first lesson. But 
when he played it did not sound at all nice. The 
big man said time would change things, and it was 


MR. MORIARITY AND THE FAIRY 25 

time that spoiled things, after all. Andy learned 
the C scale and the F sharp scale pretty well. But 
scales were not the kind of music he had dreamed 
of and he became tired of practicing. That ended 
things. He never practiced nor even learned the 
octave stretch. This was all his own fault, be- 
cause his fingers were very lively and long, but 
that would not do any good without training. 
Finally, one night the big man became discour- 
aged and said there was no use wasting time with 
a boy who would not help himself, so Andy’s 
music lessons ended. 

“ Many years passed and Andy came to Cali- 
fornia and became a green grocer. His music 
fairy hated money and business so much that she 
almost died. One evening in the Spring Andy 
came home, cross and tired from selling lettuce, 
and would not talk to his wife or five children 
at all. He went out into the poppy field and 
lay down and went to sleep. And there he 
dreamed the very same dream that had come 
to him when the big man had played on the moor. 
Down on the sea breeze came the gold and silver 
and many-colored fairies and they skipped and 


26 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

danced and bowed and pirouetted in a perfect 
dance of Spring. Up jumped old Moriarity, for- 
getting all about his rheumatism, and he danced 
with the fairies just as he had done when he was 
a boy. Right in the middle of it, when his face 
was all red and his eyes burning, out came Mrs. 
Moriarity and she held her hands on her hips 
and stared. But all of a sudden she caught 
Andy’s eye and he laughed, so up she pulled her 
skirts to her knees and commenced to dance with 
him, singing at the top of her voice all about 
Paddy Dear. She made such a noise that out 
came the five Moriarity children and they could 
hardly believe their eyes, for they had never seen 
their mother and father act that way before. But 
there was no need of worrying; out into the 
poppy field they skipped and there, by the light 
of Lady Rumdidoodledum and a million other 
stars, danced Mr. Moriarity and Mrs. Moriarity 
and the five little Moriaritys, with oodles and 
oodles of fairies. All of a sudden Mrs. Moriarity 
felt a stitch in her side and she stopped and took 
Mr. Moriarity by the ear and led him into the 


MR. MORIARITY AND THE FAIRY ^7 

house. Moriarity’s fairy was so happy that she 
laughed and wept all night. 

“So now, whenever things go a little bit wrong, 
Moriarity throws aside his vegetable bag, calls his 
wife and children, and out to the fields they go 
to dance in the evening light. Moriarity sings 
Kathleen Mavourneen and Peggy Machree and 
The Low Back Car, and out come all the fairies 
and dance, too. Of course, Mr. Moriarity’s voice 
is still pretty bad, so the cows all moo and the 
pigs all squeal, but the poppies smile and the 
wild rose bows and the fairies are happy as happy 
can be.” 


CHAPTER IV 


IN WHICH MARTHA MARY INVADES THE CASTLE, 
AND FATHER PROVES THAT HE CAN DO OTHER 
THINGS BESIDES WRITING BUSINESS IN BIG BOOKS. 
ALSO SOMEONE ARRIVES 

Father was very busy in his den, with the 
blinds all drawn and the small log fire lit and a 
huge stack of papers on his desk. So Martha 
Mary was rather afraid when she tapped at his 
door; you see, the Den was Father’s private prop- 
erty, just like a castle, and no outsiders, not 
even the children, went in very often. 

“Who is there?” called Father. 

“ Please, it is me,” said Martha Mary. 

“Who is ‘me’?” demanded Father. 

“Martha Mary, and may I come in?” 

Father shoved the big pile of papers aside 
and opened the door. 

“Well, Sister,” he said, “what is the trouble? 

Has Liza fallen in the lake?” 

28 


MARTHA MARY INVADES THE CASTLE 29 

“ Father! No! Liza never does.’’ 

“ Then what is the trouble? ” 

Martha Mary put her arm about Father’s waist 
just as she always did when she wanted to ask 
him a favor. Father always would grant the 
favor then, 

“ Please,” she said. “ Do you think you could 
do something for us?” 

“ Depends what, Sister.” 

“ Well, Mother Dear has gone to town and 
Flip has driven her to the train and we have 
played everything and don’t know what to do. So 
we thought, as long as Flip wasn’t here, you might 
be able to tell us a story. Do you think you 
could? ” 

Father laughed. “ The fact is,” he said, “ I’m 
afraid my stories would not interest you. You 
see, 1 don’t know anything about fairies. But I 
might try, I suppose ” 

Before he had finished what he supposed, 
iMartha Mary had danced down the hall and 
back she came with the whole Sherman family, 
including Hermit. It only needed Mother Dear 
and Flip to make the invasion of the den com- 


30 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

plete. Hermit was the oldest, so he chose the 
rug before the fire and Liza lay down by his side. 
Walter and Edward Lee each sat on an arm of 
Fathers Morris chair, Martha Mary sat on the 
floor with her head on Father’s knee, and John 
lay on his stomach before the fire and pulled 
Hermit’s tail. 

Father took some time to commence, so Martha 
Mary, who knew it would be hard work for him, 
tried to help him along. 

“ You don’t need to tell about Fairies,” she 
said. “ Kings and queens will do, or even every- 
day people. And Flip never begins with ‘ once 
upon a time.’ ” 

“Is that so?” asked Father. “Well, I am 
going to be different. My story is going to com- 
mence with ‘ once upon a time ’ and it isn’t going 
to be about Kings or Queens or Fairies, or not 
even every-day people.” 

“ I know,” said John. “ It’s about pirates.” 

“ It is not.” 

“ About ice cream,” said Liza. 

“ Sorry, Butterfly. Not even ice cream.” 


MARTHA MARY INVADES THE CASTLE 31 


“ I give up,” said Edward Lee, although he 
hadn’t been guessing at all. 

“ You would never guess,” said Father. ‘‘ So 
be quiet and I’ll tell you. It happened ever and 
ever and ever so long ago — I mean once upon a 
time.” 

“When was that?” asked Walter. 

“ A long time ago. Now, if you are going 
to interrupt, I will not go on. It happened once 
upon a time, in the year eighteen hundred and 
sixty-four. There was a small boy — oh, about 
nine years old — and his name was Leonard. Of 
course people did not call him that; everybody 
has to have some short name. It would never 
do to call him Lenny, because that sounded girl- 
ish, like Jennie, so they called him Mick; you see, 
he had red hair and freckles just like a little 
Irishman.” 

“Was he?” interrupted Martha Mary. 

“Certainly not! He was an American. And 
he lived on a large farm and didn’t have much 
to do all day but build forts and shoot peas in 
a willow gun and fight heaps and heaps of make- 
believe enemies. His Father was a soldier, gone 


32 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


away to fight the Southerners, and the only rea- 
son he wasn’t perfectly happy was because he was 
not old enough to go to war himself. So he used 
to make-believe and he beat the Southerners al- 
most every day. One morning he was in the 
chicken yard, fighting the hens with a wooden 

sword, and all at once he heard Guess 

what? ” 

“ His Mother calling.” 

“ No, he heard real music, with fifes and drums 
and horns playing the most wonderful tune he 
had ever heard. He jumped up and rushed across 
the field as quickly as his short legs would carry 
him, stumbling all the time, because it was the kind 
of music a person tries to keep in step with. 
Down to the fence at the edge of the farm he 
went and way off down the road he saw a cloud 
of dust, cqming nearer all the time, while the 
music grew louder and louder. It was so exciting 
that he became all hot and red and he cut his 
legs all up climbing on to the stone fence. There 
he sat until the cloud of dust came right across 
the field and he saw it was thousands and thou- 
sands of soldiers. But they weren’t like what he 


MARTHA MARY INVADES THE CASTLE SS 


thought they would be; not at all like the way his 
Father looked when he marched away to war. 
They had no brass buttons or gold braid and their 
swords didn’t shine at all. They were all dirty 
and tired and hungry, but they walked just as 
lively as though they were on a picnic, and they 
danced — some of them — and cheered and sang the 
song that goes ‘ while we were marching through 
Georgia.’ ” 

I know it,” said Martha Mary. 

“ I wish you would keep still,” said John. 
“ This is a wonderful story.” 

“Mary should know it,” said Father. “It’s 
a fine song. And so they tramped along, sing- 
ing as loud as they could, and if you had heard 
them you wouldn’t have been able to keep still, 
either. Well, Mick was very much excited. He 
jumped up and down on the stone wall, waving 
his hat and almost crying, he was so happy. Then, 
what do you think? He jumped so much that 
he tumbled off the wall and right into the road. 
It hurt awfully, too, but he couldn’t cry, be- 
cause all the soldiers would see him and he was 
a soldier’s son. He just lay still and hit his 


34 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

lower lip. Then the most wonderful thing hap- 
pened. A big man rode along and saw Mick, and 
he swung his sword above his head so it shone in 
the sun, even if it was all rusty. 

“ ‘ Halt! ’ he shouted, and all the soldiers stood 
still. 

“ The big man jumped off his horse and picked 
up Mick and said: 

“ ‘ What’s the matter. Son? ’ 

“ Mick just scowled and said, ‘ Nothing.’ 

“ ‘ Does it hurt much? ’ asked the man. 

“ ‘ No,’ said Mick. He was determined not to 
cry. 

‘‘ The big man winked to one of the ooldiers 
and said: 

“ ‘ I know what will fix it. Swing him up.’ 

“ The soldier saluted and said, ‘ On your horse, 
General? ’ 

Certainly,’ said the General. So the soldier 
picked Mick up and put him on the neck of the 
big brown horse and the General swung up be- 
hind him. 

Now,’ he said, ‘ give your orders! ’ 

“ ‘ What shall I say? ’ asked Mick. 


MARTHA MARY INVADES THE CASTLE 35 

“ ‘ You are the commander,’ said the General. 
‘ What are your orders ? ’ 

“ At first Mick couldn’t believe his ears. Of 
course it sounded too good to be true, so you could 
hardly blame him. But he wasn’t going to lose 
the chance, so he swung around and faced the 
thousands of soldiers and shouted just as loud as 
he possibly could: 

Forward, march! ’ 

“ Then he remembered something Tom, the 
farmhand, had once shouted, so he shouted it: 

Down with the rebels! We’ll eat them alive! 
Forward! ’ 

“You should have heard the soldiers shout. 
They cheered and shouted and called, ‘ Eat ’em 
alive ! ’ and down the road went the whole army, 
with Mick leading them. 

“ He did not mind the way he bounced on the 
horse; he didn’t mind anything, excepting that 
he was a real soldier and commanding the most 
wonderful army. On and on the army marched, 
singing ‘ Bring the good old bugle, boys,’ and Mick 
sang with them. He didn’t know the words so he 
just shouted, but that didn’t make any difference. 


36 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


because everyone was making such a noise that no 
one could hear what he was singing. Tramp, 
tramp, they marched and you could hear the 
bugles and almost hear the cannon if you closed 
your eyes and made-believe. And so they came 
to the end of the stone wall and the General 
whispered to Mick: 

“‘Command them to stop!’ 

“ Mick shouted, ‘ Halt 1 ’ 

“ Then the General jumped down from his 
horse and lifted Mick off and gave him a whole 
pocket of empty cartridges. He saluted him 
just as though he were a grown-up soldier and 
said : 

Have you any further orders. Sir, before we 
leave you? ’ 

Mick thought a moment, then said: ‘Yes. Go 
ahead and beat all the rebels and eat ’em alive.’ 

“ Again the General saluted him, and he saluted 
the General, and the General said: 

“ ‘ What is your name? ’ 

Mick Leonard Sherman. What is yours? ’ 

“ ‘ That’s queer,’ said the General. ‘ Mine is 
Sherman, too. Now we are going to march ahead. 


MARTHA MARY INVADES THE CASTLE S7 

all the way to the sea, and we’ll beat all the 
rebels/ 

“ Then he sprang to his horse and shouted, 
‘ Forward! ’ 

“ Down the road and around the turn went the 
whole army, while Mick sat on the fence and 
watched till the very last soldier was out of 
sight. 

“ That was the last Mick ever saw of them. But 
the soldiers, all cheered by their song and by 
the brightness of their flag of red and white and 
blue, marched on. Days and days they tramped, 
building bridges across the rivers they came to, 
helping one another when they grew very tired, 
capturing spies that they met, and winning all 
battles. Oh, but they were wonderful fighters! 
For miles and miles away you could hear their 
cannons roaring and every shot of their guns 
brought them nearer to victory and peace. For 
you know after all. Chicks, they had to fight, as 
every true American would fight, to help his coun- 
try, but they longed for peace. They didn’t 
at all enjoy killing their enemies. But right was 
on their side and so they fought, on and on, and 


S8 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


always their flag went on before them, and all 
enemies were swept away. Of course they had 
to win, because the last command Mick Leonard 
Sherman had given them was to beat all the 
rebels and eat them alive. 

“And that is all.’’ 

“ That was a story,” said John. 

“ And I knew all the time,” said Martha Mary. 

“ Knew what. Sister? ” 

“ It was General Sherman marching from At- 
lanta to the sea.” 

“ You’re right.” 

“ And I knew,” said Edward Lee. 

“What did you know. Son?” 

“ Mick was Uncle Leonard.” 

“ Again right. And that is not all. Guess 
where Mother Dear has gone! ” 

“ Give up I ” they all shouted together. 

“ She has gone to the City to meet Uncle 
Leonard and bring him here.” 

Even as he said it the do-si-do cart rolled into 
the garden and out rushed all the children to 
greet the wonderful uncle who had commanded 
General Sherman’s army years and years ago. 


MARTHA MARY INVADES THE CASTLE 39 


He laughed and got red, because he didn’t know 
why they were all so very glad to see him. They 
almost forgot Mother Dear, all excepting Liza, 
and she was too young, anyway, to care very 
much about soldiers and Generals and fighting for 
the Stars and Stripes. 


CHAPTER V 


IN WHICH FLIP TELLS MY FAVORITE STORY, AND 
IF YOU DO NOT LIKE IT VERY MUCH, FLIP 
KNOWS SOMEONE WHO WILL 

“Smudge was asleep; very peacefully asleep, 
for so huge a personage.” 

“What’s a personage?” asked Walter. 

“ A very important person. Now, don’t in- 
terrupt! Smudge was asleep at the sunset end 
of the valley. There was a bald spot on his head, 
all grey and cold, and grey spots climbing up 
him, and dark grey-blue corners that the firs 
shaded. You see. Smudge was the biggest moun- 
tain you can possibly imagine. About the feet 
of him grew oaks that were grey and they hid 
a very world of little folk. Smudge had sat at 
the sunset end of the valley for several years; 
fen thousand years, the owl says, and he knows. 
So, of course, there were many flower folks hiding 
about, for in all of the ten thousand years there 
40 


FLIP TELLS MY FAVORITE STORY 41 

had been many children born in the world be- 
yond the valley and you, Butterfly, and every- 
one else knows that every time a child creature 
is born in the world beyond the valley there is 
another flower creature, sometimes a gloriously 
bold California poppy, more often a rather silly 
little violet, born in the flower world. As I told 
you. Smudge, all grey and cold, was sleeping at 
the sunset end of the valley. As he slept, a bird, 
somewhere in the trees, piped a morning song. 
Smudge shivered and a cool, shivery breeze came 
through the groves. Again the tree creature piped 
and then the stupid bald spot of grey on Smudge’s 
nice old head took on a strange flush. As he 
flushed the sky in the other end of the valley 
grew the color of a baby rose; the grass in the 
valley stirred, and a rabbit-person with an ador- 
able bunch of white cotton for a tail sat up and 
cocked two pink ears. And Smudge, sleepy, ten- 
thousand-year-old Smudge, yawned, and his stir- 
ring sent a family of meadow larks dancing into 
the grey sky. They sang a song, all golden and 
gay, and the grey-pink sky grew golden, and the 
fir tops blushed and ripples of crimson laughter 


4^ LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

skipped on the silver-grey stream in the valley. 
The Poppy folk bestirred themselves and stretched 
wide their arms; the boldest of the violets peered 
above the frail maidenhair and a Brown-Eyed- 
Susan sat up to greet Smudge. And lazy Smudge 
slept on. But the morning would not have it so; 
down from the bald spot and over the lazy crea- 
ture’s body crept the dawn-flush, painting bits of 
red below his eyes and golden tan in the many- 
year-old wrinkles ; the beard of cypress trees shook 
out their branches and the stream that danced 
about Smudge’s mouth became boisterously happy. 
And STILL Smudge slept. 

“ Out of the pussy willows, with a flutter of 
wings, came a butterfly-person, so very yellow 
that the glow that was the sun hid in dismay for 
a moment — only a moment — ^behind a copper 
cloud. Up to the heights darted the butterfly, a 
spot of gold against the huge mountain of grey- 
pink. It soared and danced an undignified minuet, 
then floated down and tickled Smudge on the 
lips, and Smudge smiled in his sleep. The golden 
butterfly snapped its eyes, for it was very much 
provoked; up into the sky of blue it went again 


FLIP TELLS MY FAVORITE STORY 


43 


and flitted its wings, then came down and again 
tickled the old creature, this time, most wisely, 
on the nostril, and, just as you might expect. 
Smudge sneezed and woke up. 

“ Then it was very wonderful — it came like a 
wondrous burst of love music. The sun poured 
over the world and all the Flower folk and bird 
creatures and every rabbit and field mouse and 
worm danced out into the morning sunshine and 
sang a lovely morning prayer that I, stupid 
creature, have forgotten every word of. Smudge 
grunted and wiped the sleep from his eyes and 
grinned and saw the golden yellowbird butterfly. 

“ ‘ Good morning. Loveliness,’ said Smudge. 

‘‘ ‘ Good morning. Old One,’ said the disre- 
spectful yellow bird. Then she danced on 
Smudge’s lip and tickled his ear. When he bent 
branches to capture her she darted away and 
came back to laugh and impudently put her fingers 
to her nose. Sentimental old Smudge sighed and 
whispered : 

‘‘ ‘ Oh, Loveliness! I wish you were more seri- 
ous so that I could love you the more.’ 

“ Indignantly, Loveliness flew away, down into 


44? LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

the valley and flirted with a baby daisy. Smudge 
laughed indulgently, in the manner of the aged, 
and called to him his counselor. Can you guess 
who his counselor was. Butterfly? It was a man- 
baby, a tiny pink one, with just a bit of sunny 
hair on his head and funny, fat little wrinkles 
on his baby body. He was the counselor because 
he was Youth, and only Youth and Smudge could 
live forever. Smudge became dignified and 
said: 

Oh, Wise One, what is the business of the 
day? ’ 

‘‘ The baby-being laughed and caught a grass- 
hopper and said: 

“ ‘ The Blackbird.’ 

“‘The Blackbird?’ stormed Smudge. ‘What 
have I to do with her? Day and day again I 
have said that she is nothing to me; poor, somber 
bit of ebony. I want sunshine and the crystal’s 
colors and dancing and happiness; not blackness.’ 

“ The man-baby laughed and stuck a blade of 
grass in the grasshopper’s ear and whispered: 

“‘Silly, silly! If the Blackbird loves you so 
much, then you must have to do with her, for 


FLIP TELLS MY FAVORITE STORY 


45 


her love makes her more precious than all your 
other subjects.’ 

“ Smudge sneered and made a nasty remark 
about the words of infants. 

“ Then, Children, what do you think happened? 
A whole thousand years and a half passed and 
there came another sunrise. Smudge sat up and 
yawned and became frightened, for there was no 
golden flush in the sky and no poppy color in 
the fields. He shivered and called the man-baby, 
and the man-baby came riding on the back of a 
jack-rabbit, pulling its tail. 

“ ‘ Good morning. Lord Smudge,’ said the man- 
baby. ‘You look as though you needed medi- 
cine.’ 

“‘Don’t be impudent!’ shouted Smudge. 
‘ Where is the sun and the golden Butterfly bird? ’ 

“ ‘ Please,’ said the man-baby. ‘ The sun has 
rheumatism and the golden bird has gone away 
with an eagle.’ 

“‘Sol’ screamed Smudge, just like a peevish 
giant. ‘What am I to do all day alone?’ 

“ ‘ Please,’ said the man-baby. ‘ There is the 
Blackbird.’ 


46 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

“ Smudge yawned. ‘ All right/ he grumbled. 
‘Call the Blackbird!’ 

“ The man-baby stood up on the jack-rabbit’s 
back and galloped down into the valley, into a 
cradle of violets and cream-cups. There he found 
the Blackbird and said to her, ‘Come!’ The 
Blackbird hopped to the jack-rabbit’s tail, and the 
three galloped back to Smudge. 

“ ‘ Good morning,’ grumbled Smudge, ungra- 
ciously. ‘ So you’ve come at last to give me a 
day of blackness and creeps? ’ 

“ The man-baby giggled so that he tumbled 
right off the jack-rabbit and spilled into a wild 
rosebush. There he lay and you could hear him 
snickering. 

“ ‘ Well,’ shouted Smudge. ‘ Why don’t you 
speak? ’ 

“ The Blackbird hid her head and whispered, 
‘ I love you.’ 

“ ‘ Silly child,’ said Smudge. ‘ Come out and 
let me see you!’ 

“ He sat up so he could see better and then. 
Children, he almost fell right out of his valley 
bed. For the Blackbird was sitting on a branch 


FLIP TELLS MY FAVORITE STORY 47 


of a willow tree, and right on each of her black 
wings was a large ruby of lovely crimson, 
brighter — oh, very much brighter than the bright- 
est flower you have ever seen. 

“ ‘ Loveliness,’ shouted Smudge, using the same 
name he had used for the golden butterfly bird 
(men always do), ‘I thought you were black and 
somber.’ 

“ ‘ I was,’ said the Blackbird, and her eyes be- 
came all teary. 

“ ‘ But the sunlight on your wings and the val- 
ley of green of your eyes and the rainbow of your 
neck! Where did they come from. Loveliness?’ 

“ ‘ I love you,’ said the Blackbird-with-the-crim- 
son-wings. ‘ I have loved you for more than a 
thousand years, more years than there are butter- 
cups on the hill. And so, with thinking of you 
and longing to have you love me, how could I 
help but grow the way you wished? ’ 

“ ‘ Loveliness, Loveliness,’ Smudge whispered, 
in a very gruff, choky whisper. The man-baby 
fell from a willow tree and bumped his nose on 
Smudge’s toe and sat up and laughed. Then all 
the valley grew golden and the sky was glory. 


48 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


bright; the meadow larks sang as they sat on the 
twigs, and the violets and wild pansies and but- 
tercups and golden cups and poppies and brown- 
cyed-susans and forget-me-nots and daisies 
danced a lovely, happy dance that frightened 
away the very grey old owl, and another day 
was born.” 


CHAPTER VI 


m WHICH EDWARD LEE AND WALTER GO ON THE 
WARPATH BECAUSE THEY DON’T KNOW WHAT 
ELSE TO DO, AND ON ACCOUNT OF THEM JOHN 
AND MARTHA MARY MISS HEARING THE MELO- 
DRAMA 

Edward Lee and Walter were on the warpath. 
The warpath leads through the orchard to the 
power-house where the big engine pumps water 
that irrigates all the farmland, even to Levy’s 
place. The cause of the two warriors’ fighting 
mood was this; they were bored with Life; bored 
with lessons, and bored through and through with 
the stories of fairies and other silliness that Flip 
always told. So, they went on the warpath, armed 
with all the clothes-line they could find in the 
laundry, and two wooden swords. The first vic- 
tim, luckily for them, was John. He was seated 
on a wheelbarrow outside of the power-house, try- 
ing to smoke dried magnolia leaves. This made 
49 


50 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


him feel cold and wobbly and not at all in fight- 
ing trim. So it was a simple matter for Edward 
Lee and Walter to jump on him from the rear, 
tie him in approved warrior fashion, gag him 
with a handkerchief, and lead him into the 
power-house. There they held a council of war; 
John was convicted of innumerable offences, in- 
cluding kissing Uncle Mick, and condemned to 
spend the afternoon in confinement, tied to the 
power engine. He struggled manfully when 
they tied him to his post, but it was no use; 
the magnolia leaf smoke had made him too sick 
to fight, and in short order he was a helpless, 
speechless prisoner. Then the warriors planned 
the strategic stroke that would trap Martha Mary. 
Up the warpath the two men marched boldly and 
to the door of Martha Mary’s sun-room. She was 
seated on a small trunk, painting red violets all 
over a cake-plate. 

“ Madame,” said Walter, “ we have been sent by 
the King to bring you into his presence. You 
are to come at once, but you must be gagged and 
blindfolded because you mustn’t see the way to 
the Royal Palace. Are you ready? ” 


EDWARD LEE AND WALTER 


51 


Of course Martha Mary knew that John 
was the king, and she was flattered that he had 
sent for her. So she allowed herself to be bound 
and gagged and blindfolded and led down the war- 
path. She knew all the time where she was go- 
ing, because the power-house always was the 
Palace. But she didn’t know what was going to 
happen, so you can imagine her surprise when she 
found herself tied to the wall and then tried and 
convicted of crying at Flip’s last story and con- 
demned to spend the afternoon, just like John, 
in solitary confinement. She didn’t know John 
was there already, and he could not tell her be- 
cause he was gagged. So the warriors tied her to 
the wall next to John and then locked the power- 
house door and went off to find Flip. He was 
busy making a new bridle for Peggy, the Shet- 
land pony, and as he did not work with his mouth 
the warriors knew that he would have no excuse 
for not telling a story. They jumped on his 
back when he didn’t expect it and refused to get 
off until he had agreed to tell them a tale that had 
no women or fairies in it at all. Flip agreed but 
first he rolled Walter and Edward Lee off his 


52 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

back and on to the floor to prove to them that he 
wasn’t beaten. 

This is the story he told them, and although 
there is one woman in it, if the girl listeners do 
not like it they don’t have to listen because it is 
not intended for them anyhow. 

“ ‘ Doughnuts and Crullers,’ swore the pirate 
chief as he wiped a quantity of blood off his 
throat-ripper on to his red sleeve. ‘Doughnuts 
and Crullers ! I have an idea ! ’ 

“ ‘ Yoho, yoho,’ shouted all the pirate band 
gathered about. ‘ The Chief has an idea.’ 

“ ‘ A marvel-l-lous idea,’ quoth the Chief. 

“ ‘ Marvelous,’ shouted the band. 

“ ‘Doughnuts and Crullers,’ shrieked the Chief, 
although he knew lots of other cusses, too. 
‘You’ve made such a noise that I have forgotten 
it.’ 

“ Then the Chief frowned and his temper be- 
came terrible because he seldom had ideas and 
he hated to lose them when they did come. He 
became so furious that he shouted: 


EDWARD LEE AND WALTER 


53 


“ ‘ Bring out Red Blood Ike, the one-eyed 
Swede ! ’ 

“ Immediately a dozen valiant pirates sprang 
into the black tent and came out with the one- 
eyed Swede. He was a terrible looking person. 
One eye was gone, altogether, and the other one 
was pink. But that wasn’t all. He had only 
one arm — the right one— and only one leg — ^the 
left one. His mouth was black as coal. That 
came from his habit of eating fire ; he really 
could, just hke drinking water or anything else. 
And he liked it. He said it tasted like fried 
spinach. 

“ ‘ Orange Marmalade,’ he shouted, for that was 
HIS favorite cuss. ‘ What do you want with 
me ? I was dreaming of cutting off the fin- 
gers of all Republicans and you have disturbed 
me.’ 

“ ‘ Ike,’ said the Chief, ‘ I had an idea and I 
lost it.’ 

“‘Yes, yes,’ said Ike. 

“ ‘ That is all,’ said the Chief. ‘ Only now I 
feel so badly that unless you can give me a plan 
my whole day will be spoiled. And I wanted it 


54 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


to be a nice day. I have not killed anyone for a 
long time.’ 

“ Red Blood Ike bit his mustache, which was a 
habit he had when he was thinking. It kept him 
cool and steady-nerved which is the way all true 
pirates must be. 

“ ‘ Perhaps,’ he said, ‘ if someone sings to me 
a sad, sweet song, I will be able to help you. You 
know. Chief, I can always think best when some- 
one sings sad, sweet songs.’ 

“ ‘ It is a good suggestion,’ said the Chief, 
‘ nothing is as soothing to the mind as sad, sweet 
songs, unless it be killing people or fighting In- 
dians. Call out our singer, you lazy dogs!’ 

“ They called out Hairslip Charles, the bari- 
tone of the gang. He sat on a whisky barrel 
and sharpened his throat-ripper and sang Ike’s 
favorite song: the one about the Pigs and little 
Fishes : 

“ There was me and Captain Harry in the Port of Mon- 
terey. 

Sing, you pigs and little fishes in the moonlight. 

Oh, the stars they all was shining and a-dancin’ on the bay. 
Sing, you pigs and little fishes by the moon. 


EDWARD LEE AND WALTER 


55 


There was rum on Harry’s whiskers and was rum in 
Harry’s eye. 

Sing, you pigs and little fishes in the moonlight. 

So I sticks him with my sticker and was glad to see him 
die, 

And they ups and makes me Captain by the moon. 

Then I dumps ex-Captain Harry in the Port of Monterey. 
Sing, you pigs and little fishes in the moonlight. 

And we ’as a solemn funeral and for the body pray. 

Sing, you pigs and little fishes by the moon. 

Next we sails from Monterey in the sinking of the night. 
Sing, you pigs and little fishes in the moonlight. 

And we heads across the waters and an island heaves in 
sight 

In the sickly, pale blue shining of the moon. 

And on the shore was cannibals and all they wore was hair. 
Sing, you pigs and little fishes in the moonlight. 

And my mate he winks his winker and he ses he doesn’t 
care 

If they stays right where they are by the moon. 

But we lands and has a battle and we takes the Zulu band. 
Sing, you pigs and little fishes by the moonlight. 

And the blood it flew like water and it stained the island 
sand 

In the Pale blue, sickly shining of the moon. 


56 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


Then we builds a roarin’ fire and some water we did boil. 
Sing, you pigs and little fishes in the moonlight. 

And we ups and eats the cannibals we’d boiled in old shark 
oil — 

Oh, you hungry, hungry fishes by the moon. 

And now we all are cannibals and live on human meat, 
Sing, you pigs and little fishes in the moonlight. 

And we’ve grown so strong and mighty that we never can 
be beat. 

Singing, singing, singing, singing by the moon. 

“ The tears poured down Ike’s cheeks as Hair- 
slip Charles sang, and when the song was through 
Ike raised his hand and said: 

“ ‘ I have it.’ 

“ All tl^e pirates sprang to their feet. 

“ ‘ He has it,’ they shouted. 

“ ‘ Proceed,’ commanded the Chief. I forgot to 
tell you that his name was Mr. Smith, but they 
usually called him Blue Murder Smith. 

“ ‘ This is my plan,’ said Ike. ‘ We will send 
our bold men out to capture three prisoners. 
We will tie them to a stake and then, with threats 
of endless terrors, make each of them give us an 
idea. The one who has the best idea will be 


EDWARD LEE AND WALTER 


57 


granted anything he wishes and then set free; 
the other two must ’ 

“ ‘ Die/ roared the band. 

“ ‘ Die/ said Ike. 

“ Mr. Blue Murder Smith was delighted with 
the idea. He sent his men out to find three 
prisoners and they rode miles across the moun- 
tains until they came ta the stage road. Down 
the road came a coach drawn by six huge horses. 
Ike, who was leading the assaulting party, hid 
in the bushes with his men until the coach came 
by; then they sprang out and Ike put his ten- 
inch gun to the driver’s head while the gang held 
the horses. Then Shivering Sam threw open the 
door of the coach and commanded the people in 
it to come out. There were exactly three. The 
first was a traveling man who sold underwear 
when business was good. He got out, moaning 
and praying for them not to take his samples. 
The next was a handsome officer with gold 
braid on his uniform and a hold look in his 
eye. And the third was the loveliest, most 
golden-haired girl you have ever seen. The pirates 
tied them together and drove them back to the 


58 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

camp, leaving the coach-driver bound to a tree. 
For all I knovi^ he may still be there. They came 
into camp and Blue Murder Smith arose, twisted 
his mustache and greeted his prisoners. His 
orders were that they he fastened to stakes and 
then given a chance to tell the three ideas. The 
traveling salesman was the only one who strug- 
gled; he had an appointment with a customer 
at seven o’clock and he knew his firm would be 
furious if he didn’t keep it. So they gave him 
the first chance to tell an idea. After much 
thought, this is what he said: 

“ ‘ I am supposed to be in the next town to- 
night to sell a carload of underwear — ^W. & W. 
quality, selling at fifty per cent, off, I recom- 
mend that you gentlemen use it. If I don’t get 
there my firm will be in danger of losing a good 
customer and I of losing my position. So you 
let me go ahead and I’ll sell my bill and get the 
money for it; then I’ll take the stage back to- 
morrow, you can hold us up again and take the 
money away from me and then let me go. As 
long as I don’t lose the customer the firm won’t 
be so angry that the money was stolen.’ 


EDWARD LEE AND WALTER 


59 


“ ‘ Bah ! ’ sneered Shivering Sam. ‘ That is a 
poor idea. We’ll send to your customer and take 
the money away from him and keep you, too, and 
probably roast you. And we’ll make new flags 
for our fleet out of the underwear if it is red.’ 

Right-0 ! ’ said Mr. Blue Murder Smith. 
‘ Now let’s hear the soldier’s idea.’ 

“ They tied the salesman up again and dragged 
the soldier out and got his lovely uniform all 
mussed. As they pulled him he clutched the 
Angers of the golden-haired girl and kissed them, 
and she looked so sad that tears came into the 
single pink eye of Red Blood Ike. But he was a 
pirate’s son and had to be hard of heart. 

“ The soldier looked very frightened. He 
bowed politely to the pirate hand and told his 
idea and it was even worse than the salesman’s 
plan. 

“ He wanted the pirates to let him go if he 
would sing them a song. Now, you know they 
were musical pirates and liked music, so they were 
inclined to accept his offer. But when he be- 
gan to sing in a heart-breaking tone, ‘Darling, 
I am growing old, Silver threads amongst the 


60 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

gold/ they all began to hoot and shriek to drown 
his simply awful voice. Then they led him away 
without further words. 

“ Mr. Blue Murder Smith smacked his lips 
and shouted, ‘ Doughnuts and Crullers ! Have 
out the woman!’ 

“ She didn’t seem to be at all frightened. She 
shook hands with Hairslip Charles and asked Mr. 
Smith how all the little Smiths were, although 
there were none at all because Mr. Smith never 
had time to be married. Then she told her 
plan, and you can be sure it was exciting. This 
was it: 

“ She said that way down in the Southern Seas 
there was an island inhabited by a tribe of one- 
legged negroes. They lived on cocoanuts and 
whisky; they were very gentle and had no can- 
nibalistic habits (which means that they were not 
cannibals). A long time ago, nearly ten years, 
a ship had been wrecked off the island with a 
cargo of Spanish gold and fruit cake. Also 
a brand new crown that had been made in Paris 
for the Island King. When the ship was on the 
rocks two sailors had swum ashore with the chests 


EDWARD LEE AND WALTER 


61 


of gold and the crown. Then the weight of the 
fruit cake sunk the leaking ship. The two sailors 
had dragged the treasure way up on the island 
and buried it. But it would be quite easy to find. 
You landed and walked right to the very center 
of the island, then wet your finger and held it 
up in the air. The side of the finger that was 
coldest was the direction you had to dig and you 
were sure to find the treasure. 

“ ‘ Orange Marmalade,’ cussed Ike. ‘ This 
sounds good. But how do we know you are 
speaking the truth? ’ 

“ ‘ Here,’ said the golden-haired girl, ‘ is a piece 
of the gold. You see my father was one of the 
sailors who was saved.’ 

“ She held out her hand and sure enough there 
was a piece of the gold, all yellow and shiny. 
Smith bit it and said it was all right. Then the 
pirate chief took a vote and found that the girl’s 
idea had been the only good one, and that, as they 
had agreed, she should be given anything she 
wished and allowed to go free. 

“ ‘ Please,’ said the girl, ‘ may I have anything 
I really and truly wish?’ 


62 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

“ ‘ Absolutely anything,’ said Smith, and then 
he got frightened for the golden-haired girl 
said: 

“ ‘ Oh, you lovely, lovely pirate,’ and tried to 
kiss him. 

“ ‘ Well,’ shouted Smith. ‘ What do you 
want? ’ 

“ ‘ If I can have anything,’ said the girl, and 
looked with soft eyes at the soldier, ‘ I want you 
to hold these two prisoners for just two days 
so that I can have prayers said for them before 
they die.’ Her eyes twinkled; she looked at the 
salesman and said to Smith: 

“ ‘ And please, when you roast this man, put 
in plenty of salt.’ 

“‘We will,’ said Smith, and ‘ We will,’ shouted 
his men. 

“ Then they brought a horse and lifted the 
girl on to the saddle. As she leaned over to kiss 
the soldier good-by, she whispered something in 
his ear that no one else could hear, but Smith 
didn’t bother because he thought it was just a 
good-by. It wasn’t, though, as you soon shall 
hear. 


EDWARD LEE AND WALTER 63 

“ Down the road the girl went at a gallop, as 
fast as her horse could carry her. All afternoon 
she rode and just before sunset came into the sol- 
dier’s camp. Up to the General’s tent she can- 
tered and then stood before him, all breathless. 
She told him everything that had happened and 
begged him to take his men and save the soldier, 
and the salesman, too, if he wished, although she 
didn’t mind so much about him. The General 
scratched his white beard and said: 

“‘Why should I do this?’ 

“ ‘ Oh, Sir,’ she said, ‘ the soldier is your son.’ 

“‘Murder and Death,’ roared the. General. 
‘ I’ll have their heads ; the villains ! ’ 

“ He ordered out a whole company of cavalry, 
and jumped on his own horse and down the 
road they went, led by the golden-haired girl. 
They rode all night as fast as the wind, and came 
in sight of the land pirates’ camp just before 
sunrise. 

“ ‘ We must go slowly,’ said the General. In a 
loud whisper he ordered his men off their horses 
and then, with guns in hand, they crept into the 
camp on their hands and knees. The first thing 


64i LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


they heard was the soldier prisoner snoring. He 
was making such a noise that the golden-haired 
girl thought he would wake the pirates, so she 
crept up and put her fingers over his lips. He 
dreamed someone was trying to poison him and 
bit, just as hard as he could. Of course the girl 
screamed, and out came the whole company of 
pirates. Then, how they fought! You never 
heard such a racket in your life ; there was scream- 
ing and shouting and firing of guns and blood all 
about, and over all you could hear Blue Murder 
Smith cussing: 

“ ‘ Crullers and Doughnuts.’ 

“ And Ike shrieking, ‘ Orange Marmalade.’ 

“ They fought for hours and hours. That is, 
all but the salesman. As soon as the General 
cut his ropes, he grabbed his samples and ran 
like the wind. 

“ The others fought on, and the first thing you 
knew, every last pirate was stretched cold and 
dead on the hard, hard ground. And then the 
soldier held out his arms and the golden-haired 
girl came into them and the cavalry all cheered 
and the General blessed them (I mean the girl and 


EDWARD LEE AND WALTER 65 

her soldier) and — they, no doubt, lived happily 
ever after.” 

“Phew!” said Edward Lee. 

“Phew!” said Walter. 

“ Orange Marmalade,” shouted Edward Lee. 
“ Here come the pirates.” Down the road he 
charged straight into the arms of Mother Dear, 
almost knocking her over. 

All afternoon Edward Lee and Walter were 
soldiers and pirates and they attacked every- 
body on the place before dinner. Even then they 
did not want to go in, but Father insisted. 

“ And by the way,” said Father. “ Where are 
Martha Mary and John?” 

Edward Lee looked at Walter and Walter 
looked at Edward Lee and then they remembered. 
Down to the power-house they rushed and there 
were the prisoners, all pale and tired and wobbly 
in the legs. Edward Lee really felt badly. He 
kissed Martha Mary and begged her not to care. 
He offered to shake hands with John, but John 
wouldn’t shake. As for Walter, he got a laugh- 
ing fit and wouldn’t stop until Father ordered 


66 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

him off to bed without any dinner. Later Martha 
Mary sneaked up the back stairs with a tray for 
him and no one knew it. Then Mother Dear felt 
worried and said it wasn’t wise to let him go to 
sleep without eating, so she took him another tray 
and found Martha Mary’s. And still later, when 
he thought no one would notice. Father tiptoed 
up the back stairs with still more, and Walter 
had a gorgeous time. And Father laughed and 
spanked him and then hugged him. 


CHAPTER VII 


IN WHICH LIZA GOES UNDER THE SIDEBOARD; WAL- 
TER AND EDWARD LEE FIX THE CAT, AND FLIP 
PROYES THAT THE CITY FOGS ARE NICE 

It was Liza who discovered the secret. She was 
hiding from Hermit, and the best place to hide is 
under the sideboard, because Hermit is too large 
to crawl there. She was very quiet; so quiet that 
no one knew she was there at all. When Mother 
Dear and Father came in to put flowers on the 
table, she lay still as still could be and heard every- 
thing they said. Then she went right off to tell 
John although it was supposed to be a secret. 
John was busy taking an alarm clock apart, but 
he stopped when Liza came, and kissed her nose. 

“ Hullo, Big Sister,” he said. “ Which way is 
the wind blowing?” John always asked Liza 
interesting things. He didn’t act at all grown- 
upish with her like he did with the others. 

“John,” said Liza, “what do you think?” 

67 


68 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


“Lots of things,” said John. 

“ It’s a secret,” said Liza. 

“ What? ” said John. 

Then Liza told him. The whole family was go- 
ing to the City on Saturday and Uncle Captain 
Mick was going to take Martha Mary and John to 
the theater. The others were to go to the Cliflf 
House and have lunch on the beach with waffles 
and peanuts. 

John pretended not to be very much excited. 
Even with Liza he was annoying and superior 
when anyone was so happy that they could hardly 
keep still. But the others acted differently when 
they heard. Edward Lee and Walter had to do 
something big. So Walter put the white and black 
cat in a bucket of whitewash and Edward Lee 
put ink on the whitewash to make the black spots 
again. They always did queer things when they 
were glad. As for Martha Mary — she sought out 
Flip to tell him the news and there the rest of the 
younger part of the family, which was of course 
the most important part, found her, an hour 
later. 

“ Cities aren’t so much,” said John. 


LIZA GOES UNDER THE SIDEBOARD 69 

Flip thought they were. He had lived in San 
Francisco years and years ago. 

“ But you can’t do interesting things there, like 
rowing and such,” said John. 

“ You certainly can,” argued Flip. 

“And anyway,” said John, “it’s always foggy 
and cold, and things aren’t alive there like the 
trees and hills and things in your stories.” 

“ You are mistaken,” said Flip. “ I remem- 
ber perfectly well ” 

“It’s a story; isn’t it, please?” said Martha 
Mary. 

“ Well, not exactly a story.” 

“ Please,” said Martha Mary, and rubbed her 
soft, pink cheek against Flip’s forehead. So 
what could Flip do but tell the story? — ^the story 
of the Things that are alive in the City. 

“You see, John really doesn’t know anything 
about it. There are just as many dreams and 
fairies and sprites in the City as there are right 
here in our own garden. Only everyone has to 
attend to business in the City and can’t always 
remember these things. Why, the fairies that 


70 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

dance on Tamalpais are the most gorgeously 
happy fairies, I think, in all the world/’ 

“Who’s Tamperpies?” Liza wanted to know. 

“ Tamalpais is the biggest, oldest mountain you 
have ever dreamed of anywhere.” 

“ Just like Smudge? ” 

“ Exactly, only not quite so silly and spoiled as 
Smudge. It is a very dignified old mountain 
even if it is so lovely, and it sits right at the North 
Star corner of the bay and rules all the country 
for miles and miles around. But old Tamalpais 
is not the same as it used to be. When it was 
younger — oh, about twenty years ago — it was all 
covered with nice, tall trees; some of them so high 
that one would think the blue sky was resting on 
them. There were red berries, too, and vines and 
tremendously big ferns and the green things grew 
so thickly that one could hardly walk through 
them. There were wild things there, too; bears 
and deer and wild cats and heaps of squirrels and 
more singing birds than there are hairs on Her- 
mit’s tail. 

“ Right across the sunset water was the loveliest 
city; a city that rambled over a half-dozen queer 


LIZA GOES UNDER THE SIDEBOARD 71 


old hills, up and down, twisting about like a regu- 
lar jig-saw puzzle. And oh, it was a proud City, 
just as haughty and conceited as it could be. Of 
course it had lots to be conceited about, for there 
never was such a happy city of people before. 
They had wonderfully good times in such a per- 
fectly nice way, and were so lively and busy that 
of course they couldn’t help being proud. 

“ More than any of these things, the City was 
proud of its lovely mountain across the bay, and 
what do you think? The trees and flowers were 
so thick on the mountain sides that it could never 
see through them and had no idea that the City 
was there at all. The City grieved at this be- 
cause she loved the mountain so much and wanted 
it to love her. She used to send messengers over 
to it on Sundays and holidays; boys and girls by 
the dozen, in old tramping clothes, and they 
would take their lunch along, and sit in the fields 
and pick the poppies and violet-blue Lupin to 
bring back and put in vases and jugs in the City 
homes. One Sunday, — the sunniest, brightest 
Sunday you ever saw, — one of the messengers 
lay down in the grass under a bay tree and lit 


72 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

his pipe and thought. I don’t know what he was 
thinking; it must have been something uninter- 
esting, for little by little, his eyes closed, and the 
first thing you knew, he was sound asleep. The 
pipe fell out of his mouth and right into some 
dried leaves. Then it was awful; the grass caught 
on fire and before the messenger awakened the 
flames had eaten way out into the forest. The 
messenger awoke and tried to fight the fire alone, 
but it was useless. He cried for help and people 
came rushing from all sides to do what they could, 
but it was no use ; on and on the fire spread till all 
the trees and bushes on the mountain were burned 
away. All night the flames raged and the sky 
was red, like a sunset, and smoke poured over the 
bay. And in the morning the mountain lay, all 
bare and black, and oh, the City mourned to see it. 
But you know, when anything unpleasant hap- 
pens, something nice happens, too. In this case 
all the growth of green being gone from Tamal- 
pais, he could look about him for miles and the 
very first thing he saw was the wonderful City— 
and — it was a case of love at first sight! 

“ Well, the Mountain and the City loved each 


LIZA GOES UNDER THE SIDEBOARD 73 

other for years and years and years. Every 
morning, the soldiers in the City would fire a 
cannon to welcome the sun and that would awaken 
Tamalpais. He would yawn and look across the 
water; then he would smile and when he smiled 
it was like oceans of sunshine. Then the City 
would smile an answer and the day would begin. 
The hours were so short until dark, one hardly 
noticed them pass. In the evening, millions of 
lights would come out in the City like the loveli- 
est diamond necklace of a fairy queen. Only 
fairies wear dewdrops and not diamonds. Tamal- 
pais would gaze and gaze at the lights and the 
City would see the huge, black form standing out 
against the night sky, and so — just like a couple 
of children — they grew so interested watching 
each other that they forgot to go to bed at all. 
That would never do, you know. First the North 
Wind scolded the City; then the Lady Moon gave 
the mountain an awful lecture, but it didn’t do 
any good. Tamalpais began to have wrinkles 
because he did not sleep, and the City became 
rather ill-humored. So the North Wind went to 
the Sun and asked him what he thought they had 


74 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

better do. Of course the Sun had a good idea; 
he always does seem to manage things somehow. 
He waited until late in the afternoon, then the 
very last thing, just before bedtime, he went 
west, out into the ocean, and drew the water up 
in the sky to make lovely white clouds of it. 
Then the North Wind came over so gently. He 
took the white clouds through the Golden Gate 
and heaped them just like hills and hills of white, 
soft pillows, all over the City, and the mountain 
too. That night no one could sleep; the jMountain 
grieved because it couldn’t see the City, and the 
City was lonely because it couldn’t see the black 
form of Tamalpais. But that was only the first 
night. After a while they grew rather used to 
it and learned to watch for the ocean of white 
clouds. Then they would go to sleep, and it was 
always more exciting for them to wake up in the 
morning and see each other. Of course sometimes 
they would wake up and the clouds would still 
be there. Then the Mountain would grumble and 
the City would shiver, and down would come the 
North Wind to carry the clouds away again — and 
there would be sunshine. 


LIZA GOES UNDER THE SIDEBOARD 75 


“ Now, every night, when the bugles in the 
Presidio sound ‘ Taps,’ which is the soldiers’ song 
when they go to sleep, the North Wind hears the 
soft, whispering music and brings in arms full 
of white clouds so that Tamalpais and the City by 
the Golden Gate can go to sleep.” 

Edward Lee laughed when Flip had finished 
the story. 

“ That is very impolite of you,” said Martha 
Mary. “ I liked Tamalpais and you shouldn’t 
laugh.” 

“ Wasn’t laughing at that,” said Edward Lee. 

“What was it, then?” asked Martha Mary. 

“ It’s Liza,” said Edward Lee. “ Look at her. 
Someone has been putting white clouds over her.” 

Sure enough, Liza was sound asleep with her 
arms about Hermit’s neck. 

Hermit was asleep, too, with his mouth open 
and his tongue hanging out, although it is very 
bad to sleep with one’s mouth open. 

But, you' see. Hermit is only a dog and dogs 
can’t understand everything. 


CHAPTER VIII 


IN WHICH MAETHA MARY HAS A WONDERFUL DAY 
AND LEARNS THE LOVELIEST OF SECRETS AND 
flip’s aspirations are EXPLAINED 

It was Martha Mary’s birthday; the brightest, 
happiest birthday she could remeDiber. But, of 
course, the last birthday a person has always seems 
the nicest. Everyone had presents for her. From 
Father and Uncle Captain Mick there were oodles 
of books and ribbons and things for a sewing- 
basket. John borrowed fifty cents from Levy, the 
butcher, and bought a perfectly good spy-glass. 
Martha Mary could use it, he said, to spy out the 
rest of the family when she wanted company, or 
Liza when she got lost. Personally, I think he 
expected some pretty good times with it himself. 
Walter and Edward Lee sold forty bottles to 
the rags-bottles-sacks-man for fifteen cents, and 
with the aid of a nail managed to get eleven cents 
more out of their penny-bank. They bought five 

76 


' MARTHA MARY HAS A WONDERFUL DAY 77 


molasses sticks, one for each of the children, 
which left just a penny over. Mother’s presents 
were the nicest of all. First there was a white 
linen cushion to be embroidered with golden pop- 
pies; then there was a book of the Secret Garden 
and a perfectly beautiful edition of Peter Pan. 
Best of all! Guess what! There was a corset! 
It wasn’t a really and truly corset because Mother 
Dear did not approve of them, not even for 
grown-up women, but it had whalebone all up 
and down it like the strait- jacket they keep 
prisoners in. 

Martha Mary went under the trees with all her 
presents, and John was particularly nice and not 
at all grown-upish. He built a throne on the 
stump of the old oak tree and Martha Mary sat 
there, surrounded by the trees and flowers and 
birds, and John made her a wreath of buttercups 
and a daisy chain. Then he tooted a blast on 
the cook’s dinner-horn and called all the court to 
do homage to Queen Mary. 

Flip was out in the field planting alfalfa. 
When he heard the horn he stopped work, al- 
though he was quite sure it was not lunch time. 


78 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

Still, he wasn’t going to take any chances be- 
cause he certainly did like to eat. Across the 
lawn he came and there he saw the queen, sur- 
rounded by all her subjects. 

“ What is this? ” asked Fhp. ‘‘ Why the cele- 
bration? ” 

“ Please,” said Martha Mary, a little bit choky, 
“ you have forgotten. Flip, and I did not want 
you to forget.” 

“What did I forget, Ladykin Dear?” asked 
Flip. 

Martha Mary would not tell because she did 
not want him to feel badly. Neither would John. 

“ You tell me. Butterfly,” Flip coaxed Liza. 

“ It’s her birfday,” said Liza, “ and there is 
going to be cake with candles for tea.” 

Well, at first Flip felt so badly that he couldn’t 
talk at all; then he got an idea. 

“ Queen Mary,” he said, “ I did forget and it 
was hateful of me. But there was a reason for 
my forgetting. You see I have a secret, too, and 
I’ve been thinking and thinking about it and al- 
most forgot everything else. Will you forgive 


MARTHA MARY HAS A WONDERFUL DAY 79 

“ Please,” said Martha Mary. “ Yes, but I 
should like to know the secret.” 

Flip bit his lip. He really wanted to tell but 
did not know if he had the right. You see when 
people know nice things it is much more fun to 
tell them to everybody. So he agreed. He said 
the secret was only for Martha Mary, so the boys 
and Liza would have to go away for ten minutes. 
Martha Mary raised her willow branch scepter 
and ordered them away. Then Flip lay on the 
grass and rested his head against Martha Mary’s 
knees and closed his eyes. 

“ Please,” said Martha Mary. “ I am wait- 
ing.” 

‘‘ It’s hard to tell. Silly,” said Flip. 

“ But you promised.” 

“ Well,” said Flip, and got all red. “ I’m in 
love!” 

‘‘ Flip ! ” said Martha Mary, so surprised that 
she almost tumbled off her throne. “ Only grown- 
ups fall in love.” 

“ But I am grown-up. I’m more than twenty- 
four years old.” 

‘‘ Is that old enough? ” 


80 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

“Yes, if the person you love is more sensible 
than you are/' 

“ Is she? And is she nice? " 

“Nice! Martha Mary, let me tell you about 
her. In the first place, she is very small for such 
a grown-up person. She looks no more than 
fifteen, but she is all of twenty years old. And 
she is so fine — and really very pretty, Ladykin. 
She has oodles and oodles of brown hair and the 
kindest, softest brown eyes and the dearest funny 
little nose and a strong, mannish jaw. You 
couldn’t help liking her. And she likes nice 
things; birds and flowers and books — and fairies, 
too. And she likes me!” 

“ Now I know,” said Martha Mary. 

“^Yhat?” 

“ You told Mother Dear when you came that 
you had aspirations. Mother would not tell me 
what aspirations were, but now I know. She 
is it.” 

“ Not exactly,” said Flip. “ But she has to 
do with them. Shall I tell you all about them? ” 

“ Please,” said Martha Mary. 

“ Well, it began years and years ago. I lived 


, MARTHA MARY HAS A WONDERFUL DAY 81 

in San Francisco with a splendid father and a 
mother as lovely and fine as Mother Dear. My 
best friend was a little, brown-haired girl. Her 
name was Janet, but that was too grown-up and 
old-fashioned, so we called her Jane although 
that is rather old-fashioned, too. But, you see, 
Jane was an old-fashioned girl. We played the 
nicest games, Martha Mary, and when we were 
tired I would tell Jane stories just like I tell you. 
One day a man came to Jane’s house. He stood 
behind the door and listened to one of my stories. 
Later he made me tell him others. When I had 
finished he said that when I was older I would 
be an author and write books. That became my 
aspiration. I made up my mind to be an author; 
not a great one who would try to change the 
world, but just a simple, quiet one who could 
tell stories that would make people just a little 
more happy. Then, Ladykin, one night some- 
thing awful happened. I will not tell you 
much about it. There came a terrible earth- 
quake. I don’t like to talk about it. A brick 
chimney fell right on my mother and father’s 
bed and killed them. It was awfully lonely then. 


8a LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

I had learned to love Jane meanwhile but I was 
quite poor and so I had to go away. I couldn’t 
make money writing stories because my work was 
not good enough and I was not known. So I de- 
cided to work on a farm and write when I found 
the time. And here I am. Now, Martha Mary, 
guess what!” 

“What?” asked Martha Mary. 

“ I have been working very hard every night 
on my stories all the time I have been here. Did 
you see the envelope the postman brought for 
me this morning?” 

“ Yes.” 

“ It was from the publishers who print books. 
They have really and truly bought my stories and 
sent a perfectly good check and — I am an author.” 

Martha Mary’s eyes were all watery. “ Flip,” 
she said, “ I am so happy I have to hug you.” 
She hugged him and then remembered about her 
birthday. 

“ I forgive you and excuse you altogether for 
forgetting,” she said. “ Your secret is the nicest 
thing that has happened to-day.” 

“ But that is not the secret.” 


MARTHA MARY HAS A WONDERFUL DAY 83 

“Flip. Is there more?” 

“There is.” 

“ Tell me, please.” 

“ I was so excited when my letter came that 
Mother Dear said when she heard of it — guess 
what! ” 

“ I give up.” 

“ She said I could ’phone to Jane and tell 
her to come right down so that she could tell 
me how happy she is.” 

“And will she?” 

“Will she! I should just say so! She is on 
her way now and will be here in an hour.” 

“Oh!” said Martha Mary; “I didn’t know 
that so many wonderful things could happen in 
one day. Now I want to call the children.” 

Flip blew the horn and across the lawn came 
all of the queen’s court. 

“ I want to know the secret,” said John. 

“ Can’t tell,” said Martha Mary. “ But it is 
nice. Someone is coming.” 

“ Captain Mick,” shouted Walter. 

“ Not at all. It is a girl-person.” 

“ Do we know her? ” 


84 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

“ No, but you will and you will like her,” said 
Flip. ‘‘ Her name is Jane.” 

“ I wish an hour was not so long,” said Martha 
Mary. 

“ Perhaps,” said John, “ if you told us a story, 
Philip, it wouldn’t seem so long.” 

“ Perhaps,” said Flip. Then because it was a 
birthday and Martha Mary was queen, he told a 
queen story with Kings and Knights and Ladies. 
This was it: 


CHAPTER IX 


IN WHICH IS TOLD THE STORY OF ALFRED OF THE 
LOW COUNTRY, AND JANICE, WHO LOVED THE 

queen’s page 

“ In the days of the good and splendid King 
Arthur there was an old letter-writer named 
Baudin. He lived in a small garden below the 
Castle wall, and the loveliest hollyhocks and jas- 
mine grew about the door of the cottage. He 
had everything he desired and that was not a 
great deal. His business was to write letters; 
love letters and business letters for the Knights 
and Ladies who had never been to school and 
could not write for themselves. His daughter 
was a very pretty little sunshiny girl who kept 
his house in order and cooked his meals. She 
sang as she worked and was always happy.” 

“Please, what was her name?” asked Martha 
Mary. 

“Her name? Why, I have really forgotten.” 

85 


86 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

“Was it Jane? I should like it to be Jane.” 

“Jane? Now, perhaps, it was. Or Janice. I 
think it must have been Janice in those days. 
So we wiU call her that. Janice used to do her 
work early in the morning so that she might spend 
the afternoon sewing or caring for the garden 
flowers. Next to her father she loved flowers 
more than anything else in this wide, wide world. 
They were happiness, just as the song of the birds 
and the shining of Lady Rumdidoodledum and 
the other stars is happiness. Janice was so very 
happy that she never wished to have things 
changed. She wanted to go on for ever caring 
for her father and living in the cottage by the 
Castle wall. True, at times, she thought of the 
lad who hoped to marry her some day, but he does 
not come into the story for a long time. 

“ One day, as J anice was sitting under a 
cypress tree, a handsome Knight came down the 
road, mounted on a splendid black horse. The 
stranger wore a blue satin jerkin, black knee- 
breeches, and stockings of blue. There was gold 
braid on his suit and a golden tassel dangling 
on his hat. From the brim waved a lovely grey- 


STORY OF ALFRED AND JANICE 87 

blue plume. Very straight he rode, and dignified, 
looking neither to right nor left. As he passed 
the cottage Janice looked up and saw that the 
black horse was very tired. 

Eand Sir,’ she said, and blushed at her bold- 
ness, ‘ your horse is worn with the heat. May I 
fetch him water? ’ 

“ The Knight looked down and when he saw 
lovely Janice he swept his' plumed hat to his 
breast. 

“ ‘ Lady,’ said he, ‘ your kindness well becomes 
your fairness. If you will but show me to the 
well I shall thank you and carry the water myself.’ 

“Janice curtsied and led him through the ivy- 
covered gate, bringing a bucket to the trough 
for him. When he had filled it and would carry 
it out she took it up. 

“ ‘ Good Sir,’ she said, ‘ you may spill it and 
harm your beautiful suit. I will bear it for you.’ 

“ The Knight bowed. ‘ Our Good Lady would 
be annoyed,’ said he, ‘ were I to appear before 
her in disarray. It were best that I do not soil 
myself.’ 

“ So Janice took the pail and smiled to her- 


88 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

self at the conceit of the good Knight. While 
the horse drank the girl rubbed its silky coat and 
patted its neck. Then the Knight bowed again 
and sprang to his saddle. Janice curtsied and 
went in to darn her father’s sox. 

“ You may think she would be excited at hav- 
ing aided a Knight of King Arthur’s Round 
Table, but she was not at all. She thought much 
of the splendid black horse but not at all of its 
conceited master. With him, however, it was 
different. When he had ridden away he could 
not forget the girl’s beauty and he saw her face 
wherever he went. He became very unhappy, 
then, for he found himself very much in love, 
and a Knight of Arthur’s Court could never 
marry the daughter of a letter-writer. Every day 
he rode by the cottage and saw Janice under the 
trees, sewing or trimming flowers. He would 
sweep his hat to his breast and she would bow 
without smiling, although often she came out with 
a pail of water for the horse. Naturally the 
more the Knight saw her the more he loved her, 
and the more miserable he became. 

“ On the birthday of Guinivere, Arthur’s 


STORY OF ALFRED AND JANICE 


89 


Queen, there was a royal tournament planned, 
with fencing and lance bouts and dancing on the 
oak lawns. Tents were raised and they flew 
the Queen's colors: a pavilion was built with a 
canopied box where the Queen sat surrounded 
by her Ladies and attendants. All morning there 
were gaming and May dances. In the early 
afternoon the Queen’s Herald blew a blast on his 
silver trumpet and announced the Queen’s bout in 
which all Knights might compete. The prize was 
to be a crimson ribbon from Guinivere and the 
granting of any request in her power that the 
winner might make. Again the Herald blew a 
blast and out from the tents came the Knights 
astride the finest of Arabian and Russian horses. 
Their lances were under their arms; their Ladies’ 
colors on their sleeves. To the center of the oak 
lawn they charged where the din of fighting and 
the crashing of lances against shields became so 
uproarious that one could scarcely hear the cheers 
of the spectators. For an hour they fought until 
Alfred of The Low Country — (that being the name 
of the Knight who loved Janice) — and Herbert of 
The Blue Feather, were left. Again and again 


90 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


they charged — fiance met shield and shield glanced 
off lance, till suddenly, Alfred’s horse reared and 
Knight Alfred slid to the ground. He sprang up 
and struck the animal across the haunches with 
his lance, so that the horse dashed away across 
the field. Then Alfred threw down his lance 
and drew a dagger, all shiny and sharp. Immedi- 
ately Knight Herbert sprang to the ground 
with his dagger drawn and they fell to fighting 
again. 

“ Meanwhile Alfred’s horse, freed of his rider, 
whinnied a moment, then stampeded toward the 
further edge of the oak lawn where the villagers 
and their wives and daughters were gathered to 
see the sports. Right into the center of them 
he rushed, directly at Janice, who stood terrified 
at the side of the old letter-writer. The crowd 
cried out in fear when, just as the horse reached 
and would have trampled Janice to the ground, 
a page boy, who had stolen away from his place 
by Queen Guinivere, dashed forward, grasped the 
horse by the mane, and stopped his rush. Only 
a moment the animal hesitated, then turned his 
head and sprang forward into the field again with 


STORY OF ALFRED AND JANICE 


91 


the boy clinging to his mane with all his might. 
The steed plunged and reared and finally, just 
as he was captured by guards who rushed for- 
ward, he shook the boy off. The page lay where 
he had fallen, his head buried in his arm. Past 
the guard and out to him, Janice rushed and 
sank down and took his wounded head on her 
knee. 

‘‘ Meanwhile, across the field, the combat had 
continued as though nothing else had happened. 
But King Arthur had seen all and determined 
to reward the boy. 

“ Thrusting and sparring, Alfred of The Low- 
land and Herbert of the Blue Feather fought, 
till suddenly Alfred’s dagger pierced his oppo- 
nent’s side and Herbert fell, bleeding. Alfred was 
winner of the tournament. 

“ To Guinivere he came, flushed and happy, and 
kneeled before her. He kissed her hand, offering 
her, at the same time, his victorious dagger. She 
smiled and took the weapon, then pinned to 
Alfred’s sleeve the red ribbon she wore at her 
heart. 

“ ‘ Arise, Sir Conqueror,’ she said. ‘ Ask of me 


92 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


what you will and if it be in my power I shall 
grant it.’ 

“ ‘ My Lady,’ said Alfred, ‘ all things are in 
your power; the very birds sing when you smile 
upon them.’ 

“ ‘ Flatterer,’ said Guinivere. ‘ You frighten 
me, I fear you are going to ask a very great 
favor of me.’ 

“ ‘ For me,’ said Alfred, ‘ it will be greater 
than vast estates. For you. Dear Queen, it will be 
little more than a spoken word. I ask that you 
raise Janice, daughter of Baudin, the letter-writer, 
to my rank, so that I may marry her.’ 

“ ‘ Your wish shall be granted,’ said the Queen. 
‘You may go to your love, and tell her my 
pleasure.’ 

“ Across the field, on his black horse, went Al- 
fred, to find Janice on her knees, bathing and 
bandaging the page’s head. She rose as Alfred 
approached. He bowed proudly and sprang to 
the ground. Before all the gathered villagers, 
he spoke, saying to Baudin, the father: 

Good man, the Queen, knowing the love 
that is in my heart for your daughter, has or- 


STORY OF ALFRED AND JANICE 


dained that she be raised to my rank so that I 
may make her my wife.’ 

“ Old Baudin became so embarrassed that he 
could hardly speak. 

The honor you do us is great. Good Knight,’ 
he said. ‘ It is very wonderful tidings, you bring. 
Janice, my child, what say you?’ 

Verily, we are deeply honored,’ she said. 
‘ And we thank you and beg you to ask the for- 
giveness of my Lady, the Queen, but I do not 
love you, Sir Knight; I would ask that you do 
not demand that I marry you.’ 

“‘Great Saints!’ shouted Alfred. ‘Am I to 
understand that you refuse a chance to marry 
with one of my station and bearing? Strike me, 
but you are a proud one and the more to be de- 
sired. Sir, what say you of the girl’s nonsense? 
Command her to rise up and go to the Queen that 
she may be made of high rank and a fitting bride 
for me 1 ’ 

“ ‘ Sir Knight,’ said old Baudin, now very 
proud and calm, ‘ I am the father of my child’s 
happiness, not the keeper of her heart. Her wish 
is my wish ever. She will thank our good Queen 


94 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


for her graciousness and beg to decline the honor/ 

“ ‘ We shall see/ said Alfred. ‘ Come, I shall 
lead you to the Queen. Perhaps her Gracious 
Self will be able to drive this stupidity out of 
your head.’ 

“ Janice put her fingers in his and allowed him 
to lead her to the Queen’s box. At Guinivere’s 
feet sat the page, his head bandaged, his chin in 
his hands. 

“ Janice kneeled and bowed her head. 

“ ‘ Oh, kindest of queens,’ she whispered. ‘ I 
thank you for your favor. I am honored more 
than my dreams had ever hoped for. But I beg. 
Dear Lady, that you will not demand my accept- 
ance.’ 

“ ‘ I do not understand,’ said Guinivere. 

“ Then Janice told her that she did not love the 
Knight; that she loved the page who had saved 
her and who had loved her long and secretly. She 
went on: 

Dear Queen, on this, your birthday, when you 
are trying to make all the world happy, do not 
force me to accept the kind offer of this good 
Knight. Let me go back to my father’s garden.’ 


STORY OF ALFRED AND JANICE 95 

“ As she spoke, Knight Alfred had become red 
and furious. He spoke, finally, saying: 

“‘I take back my request, O Queen. I could 
never take to wife a hussy who would bestow 
her love upon a page. I do not wish her; I ask 
no other prize than your red ribbon and your 
kind thoughts.’ 

Sir,’ said Guinivere, ‘ your request shall be 
granted. And,’ she said, turning to the page, 
‘you, sir. Do you love this girl?’ 

As I love the music of the winds and the 
birds and your voice,’ said the page. 

“ ‘ Then,’ said Guinivere, ‘ for your bravery you 
may have her and make her your wife.’ 

“ The page kneeled, first at the feet of the 
Queen and then before Janice. She rested her 
trembling fingers on his shoulders and kissed him 
upon the brow. 

“ Then arose King Arthur. 

“ ‘ Lad,’ said he, ‘ you have pleased me twice 
to-day: firstly in saving, secondly in loving this 
child. Therefore^ I shall grant you whatever you 
wish. Think well! What does your heart most 
desire? ’ 


96 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

“ ‘ Sire,’ said the page, rising and bowing hum- 
bly, ‘ I am allowed to serve the fairest queen and 
the bravest king in the world. I am loved by the 
dearest maiden in the kingdom. I have nothing 
to ask; there is no more I desire of Life but to 
live and die for you.’ 

“ ‘ Well spoken,’ said Arthur, the King. 
Then he turned to Janice. 

“ ‘ I know not which of you is the more fortu- 
nate,’ he said. ‘ Life should hold much for you. 
Go, then, with your husband, and remember that 
Arthur ordains that you shall honor, respect, 
and ever love him, and be happy, both of you, 
always.’ 

‘‘And they were!” 

“ Of course they were,” said a strange voice 
when Flip had finished. “ If they loved each 
other they couldn’t help but be happy always.” 

The children all jumped up and looked through 
the trees. There was a girl standing there; a 
brown-haired girl with laughing eyes and a jaw 
just like a man’s. Martha Mary knew who it 
way right away. It was Jane. Even if you 


STORY OF ALFRED AND JANICE 


97 


weren’t sure you could tell by the color of Flip’s 
face. He stood up, all red, and said: 

“ Hullo, child,” and shook hands with her, just 
like a couple of almost strangers would do. Then 
he introduced her to the children. 

“ Jane, this is John Sherman, by far the most 
important member of the family. John, this is 
Jane. And this, Jane, is Martha Mary, but we 
will call her Sister. These are the almost twins: 
Edward Lee who dips cats in whitewash, and 
Walter, who puts new spots on them with blue 
ink. This is Liza alias Elizabeth alias Butterfly. 
And this, if you please, is Hermit. Y^ou know 
he was really the one who discovered me.” 

Hermit, when he heard his name, got up and 
yawned, then wagged his tail and smiled as po- 
litely as could be. 

“ Please,” said Martha Mary, when they were 
all introduced. “ It’s my birthday and we should 
like you to stay and help me celebrate.” 

“ But Jane has — er ” Flip started to 

grumble. 

“ Jane has nothing. Young Man,” said Jane. 
“ I know you are all on edges to show me the 


98 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


proofs of your book and tell me how wonderful 
you are, but you will have to wait. I’m going to 
celebrate.” 

“ All right,” said Flip. “ Then I’ll go jump in 
the lake — or eat a snail or something.” 

It was John who saved the day. “ Last one 
to the stable is it and a nigger-baby,” he shouted. 

Away rushed all the children, and Jane would 
have followed, but her skirts were too tight. 
So she sat on the haystack next to Flip and 
when Martha Mary turned around just once, she 
saw — ^but Martha Mary would not tell us what she 
saw. 


CHAPTER X 


IN WHICH JANE STAYS LONGER THAN SHE HAD 
EXPECTED TO AND WE ENTERTAIN HER. AS 
USUAL, FLIP TELLS A STORY 

Everyone was rather anxious to see how 
Mother Dear would receive Jane. Mother did 
not take to strange women as a general thing, 
but, as Flip explained later, Jane was hardly 
a woman, so it made matters easy. Flip was the 
only one who was embarrassed. He almost ruined 
his hat, twisting it out of shape, as he said: 

“ Mrs. Sherman, this is Jane Houghton. I hope 
you will like her.” 

Mrs. Sherman shook hands with Jane, and the 
grip of the two women was like the grip of two 
men. Jane was not at all ill-at-ease. Then Mrs. 
Sherman put her two hands on Jane’s shoulders 
and suddenly kissed her on the forehead. 

Walter giggled and turned a handspring. 

And so, instead of taking the afternoon train 
99 


100 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

back, Jane was invited to stay as the Shermans’ 
guest until Monday. Of course, Mother Dear 
explained that it was because Martha Mary had 
asked it and it was her birthday, but I think 
Mother was romantic and liked to see Jane and 
Flip together. You can never tell what these 
grown-ups are thinking! 

Saturday afternoon. Flip hitched up the do-si- 
do-cart and in piled all the children, with Jane 
and Flip, and they went on the loveliest picnic 
they had ever had. Parts of it were a surprise. 
For example, they had had no idea that Mother 
Dear and Father were invited, but when they 
reached the Cypress trees near the ocean beach, 
at sunset, the first thing they saw was Mother 
standing near a campfire that Father had built. 
There was the most wonderful smell in the air; 
it was like fried bacon, and fried bacon it was. 
There was green corn, too, roasted in the fire, 
and chicken cooked on a forked stick, and water- 
melon and pancakes and heaps of doughnuts. 
Everyone ate as much as they could, and then 
Father lit his pipe and Mother sat on the ground 
next to him and the Children all lay on their 


JANE STAYS, FLIP TELLS A STORY 101 

stomachs on the sand, with Jane and Flip, to 
watch the moon come up over the ocean. Once, 
when he thought no one was looking. Flip kissed 
Jane on the ear, but Edward Lee caught him, 
and for punishment Flip had to tell a story. He 
grumbled and said it was too nice a night to 
spoil with his nonsense, but when Jane said: 

“ Please, Dear,” he couldn’t help it. 

“ This is to be a story of the trees,” said Flip. 

John sniffed. “ You always tell about things 
that are not alive,” he said. “ Father doesn’t. 
Neither does Captain Mick.” 

“ But, John,” said Martha Mary, very much 
surprised, “ the trees are alive.” 

“ They can’t talk.” 

“ They could, once,” said Flip. “ And they still 
do talk in their own language, but of course you 
cannot understand them.” 

“ Can Father? ” asked Edward Lee. 

“ I don’t think so,” answered Father. 

“Can you. Flip?” 

“ No, but I know what they mean to say. 
Listen, now, and I will try to finish the story 
before anyone interrupts again. Elizabeth, stop 


102 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


sticking things in Hermit’s ear! Now — where 
was I?” 

“You hadn’t started,” said Martha Mary. 

“All right; then I’ll start with once, years and 
years ago. It was in a large forest, way up in 
the mountains, where there are only wild things 
and no men. The trees grow very tall and straight 
there; the branehes are heavy and the trunks 
all covered with grey moss, and everything else 
is green. The forest, many years ago, was ruled 
by a lovely prineess. Her name was Shade of 
the Mountain Lake and she was a large, lovely, 
blue crane. The trees just called her ‘ Princess,’ 
because that was easy to say when the wind 
hummed in the branehes, and ‘ Shade of the 
Mountain Lake ’ was much too long. Princess 
ruled her tree land for many years and the wood- 
folk were glad that they had chosen her, because 
she was so wise and graceful and lovely. You 
see, her soft breast feathers were colored with 
the blue of the sky of a Spring morning, and 
the grey of her slender neck was taken from the 
shaded spots near an old mountain. The green of 
her eyes once belonged to two splendid emeralds. 


JANE STAYS, FLIP TELLS A STORY 103 

and when the emeralds lost their color they be- 
came priceless diamonds. So how could Princess 
help but be beautiful? 

“ She was very proud of her kingdom; of the 
tall green trees and the blue-green lake and the 
very blue sky. All day she would fly over the 
hills, smiling on her people, sailing here and there, 
down and up, sometimes almost to the sun. One 
day, when she was very high in the Heavens, 
she saw, way off across the valley, a spot of red. 
That was a color that was not known in the 
mountains, so she flew with the wind, out across 
her valley and another valley until she came to a 
land where men lived. And there, what do you 
think she saw? Fields and fields and fields of the 
loveliest wild flowers, all golden and purple and 
pink, and gardens with red, red roses, and sweet- 
smelling lilacs climbing over the stone walls, and 
soft-colored fruit blossoms — there were more flow- 
ers than days in a hundred years. All after- 
noon she flew over the gardens, smelling the per- 
fumes and always finding something new to sur- 
prise her. When night came she flew back to 
her kingdom in the mountains. But she was very 


104 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


sad, for she had thought her land the loveliest 
in the world and now she knew that it had none 
of the wonderful flowers that grew in the man’s 
world. All night she grieved and in the morn- 
ing called her council to her — a branch of a pine 
and a branch of a redwood and a branch of the 
single oak that grew at the foot of the mountain. 
She told them how she had spent the day and 
how very, very much she wished her land to have 
all the colors and not only the green in Spring 
and the brown in Autumn. Then the branch of 
the single oak spoke and said: 

Let me help you. The Pine has always 
been the most plentiful tree in the mountains and 
the Redwood has been the tallest. I have been 
out of place and able to do but little save giving 
shade. Now I think I can help.’ 

“ She whispered her idea to Princess, and when 
Princess heard she was so pleased that she soared 
high into the sky and sang to the morning sun. 
Then down again she flew, and told the silver 
stream her secret. And this is what she did: 

“ First she went to the single oak and took 
from it several flne, green branches, all covered 


JANE STAYS, FLIP TELLS A STORY 105 

with fresh leaves. These she carried one at a 
time up the side of the hill and laid them side 
by side on the grass. Then she called to the sun 
and he came over the treetops and warmed the 
oak leaves with his golden light. When they were 
all glowing Princess called to the clouds and asked 
for just a little rain. Down it came, so very 
quietly that not even the sun went away. And 
so the drops, falling through the sunshine to the 
oak leaves, formed a lovely rainbow. Then the 
rain stopped, but the rainbow remained, coloring 
the oak leaves with blue and red and gold and 
amber and violet. Princess was so happy, then, 
that she could hardly wait to carry the beautiful 
colored sprays into the forest to plant them at 
the foot of the tall trees. All the wood folk — 
the rabbits and the snakes and the silly young 
bears — came out to watch her as she worked. 
When her task was through she called all her 
subjects to her and introduced them to the new 
color she had brought into the mountains, and 
she called it Child of The Oak. 

“ Child of The Oak grew very much in a short 
time. She had the form of a clinging vine; up 


106 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM^S CHILDREN 


over the branches of the other trees she crept, 
just like a really and truly baby. Her colors 
were the loveliest you have ever seen. Just think 
of leaves that were golden red as the loveliest pop- 
pies and green as the wildest hillside and violet 
like the softest field flowers and blue like the 
morning sky. She was so beautiful that all the 
trees grew to love her in a very short time. 

“ Then, one day, the most awful thing hap- 
pened. 

“ It was early morning in the month of May. 
Across the further valley and right through the 
Valley of Shade of The Mountain Lake and up 
the hillside and into the mountain land, came a 
whole school of children, to the place where no 
man had ever been before. It was very nice at 
first. They sang songs about Angels and Fairies 
and the one that went like this: 

“ I’ll sing you a song of the fields in the Spring 
With a chatter of birds in the tree tops, 

And the poppies and daisies will dance as I sing 
And the birdlings will warble and flutter a wing 
And the sleepy, fat owl will wake up, the old thing! 
As I sing to the birds, the gay happy birds. 

The silly young birds in the tree tops. 


JANE STAYS, FLIP TELLS A STORY 107 

“ Then they tied ribbons to the tallest pine 
and took hold of the ends and danced a May 
dance, and their pink and white dresses, with 
their baby cheeks all flushed, and their golden 
hair waving, they looked just like the South 
Wind. 

“ But of course such nice things could never 
last. Pretty soon one of the children found a 
spray of Child of The Oak and plucked it 
and carried it to the awfully awesome person 
who was in charge of the party. She said it 
was: 

“ ‘ Remarkably beautiful and most ethereal,’ 
and, although I haven’t an idea what that means, 
I know by the way she said it that it must be 
something hateful. Back she sent the children 
to gather as much as they could And. They 
rushed about tearing Child of The Oak up by 
the roots and it hurt just as much as though some- 
one were to pull Liza’s hair. The tall trees all 
hung their heads so they wouldn’t see Child of 
The Oak suffer and the Mother Oak moaned 
and held out her arms, but of course no human 
being could understand her. It was so pitiful, 


108 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


SO unfair, and no one knew the least thing to do. 
And then, what do you think? Guess what, 
Edward Lee! What do you think, Walter? Oh, 
you never can guess! 

“ Down from the top of the mountain came the 
North Wind. Princess went to him, weeping, and, 
‘ Father Wind,’ she cried, ‘ can’t you help Child 
of The Oak? ’ 

“ ‘ Certainly,’ said North Wind. Do’wn to the 
May party he swept and blew deep breaths of 
the pollen that grows on dryads’ wings all over 
the Child of Oak branches. The pollen that grows 
on dryads’ wings is deadly poison, you know. 
So, as soon as the children touched it, they be- 
came ill; they found spots of red on their arms, 
and their faces became swollen as though they 
had mumps. They itched simply miserably, and 
all went home sick, and had to be put to bed 
with salves all over them. And so, they never 
dared touch Child of The Oak again, because 
the North Wind had put the poison on her to 
protect her. When the men came to the moun- 
tains they never touched the lovely colored leaves, 
for they called them ‘ Poison Oak.’ 


JANE STAYS, FLIP TELLS A STORY 109 

“ But Princess did not mind, because she knew 
that the real name was Child of The Oak and 
that Child of The Oak was the loveliest child in 
all the hill world.” 


CHAPTER XI 


IN WHICH WALTER DOES NOT WANT NINE EIGHTS 
TO BE seventy-two; and MARTHA MARY FEELS 
SO BADLY FOR HIM THAT SHE GOES TO SEEK 
ADVENTURE. SHE FINDS IT 

It all happened because Walter couldn’t learn 
how many times eight was seventy-two. The eight 
tables are hard enough, but when it comes to divid- 
ing by eight even John made mistakes at times. 
Walter insisted that eight sevens were seventy- 
two. Mother Dear said they were not, but Wal- 
ter said he knew best. Mother Dear looked sorry 
and said if Walter were quite positive he was 
right, then she supposed he must be, but she had 
learned that nine eights were seventy-two. 

“ They’re not,” said stubborn Walter. 

“What are they then, Dear?” asked Mother. 

“ Don’t know,” said Walter. “ But I won’t 
have them seventy-two.” 

Then Mother Dear almost lost her patience, 
no 


MARTHA MARY SEEKS ADVENTURE 111 

“ Very well, Walter,” she said. “ But, if you 
cannot believe your mother, I hardly think it 
worth while helping you, so you may leave the 
room.” 

Walter lost his temper altogether and went 
out, slamming the door and kicking his feet. 
Later, Martha Mary, who felt as badly for him 
as she did for Mother Dear, although she knew 
Mother was right, found him in the hayloft, with 
a miserable look in his eyes and a smudge of dirt 
where tears had been. 

“ Please, Mr. Brother,” she said, “ don’t feel 
badly.” 

“ Go away,” said Walter. “ I hate you.” 

“Walter,” pleaded Martha Mary, “you 
shouldn’t. It hurts when you are that way. 
Please come play.” 

“Won’t,” said Walter. “Get out of here; I 
hate you.” 

Really miserable and almost crying herself, 
Martha Mary crept away to find the rest of the 
family. Father was busy writing Things in a 
large book. Mother Dear was bathing Liza; 
John was rowing Edward Lee on the lake Ocean. 


112 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


‘‘ Don’t bother me,” he called. ‘‘ I can’t hear 
you. I am miles away.” 

More unhappy than before, Martha Mary 
walked down the gravel path to the gate. Then 
she opened it, a thing she rarely did, and went 
out. It was rather dusty on the county road, 
and the wind was blowing, and it fluffed her hair 
all about her face. It felt good — the wind always 
does. Almost immediately Martha Mary became 
more cheerful, and as soon as she became cheer- 
ful she had an idea. They always come when 
one is happy. She made up her mind to have 
an adventure; she didn’t know exactly what it 
would be, but an adventure she would have. She 
had never had a really and truly one all to her- 
self; John had them; so did Walter and Edward 
Lee, like whitewashing and inking the cat, or find- 
ing a bird’s nest in the old straw hat in the hay- 
loft. But nothing had ever really happened to 
Martha Mary and she didn’t know just how to 
begin. She thought for a long time; then a brown 
squirrel popped up in the middle of the road, 
cocked its ea^rSj and scampered into the poppy 
field. 


MARTHA MARY SEEKS ADVENTURE 113 


“ I’ll follow ‘ him,’ ” decided Martha Mary, 
“ and see what happens. Perhaps it will be like 
Alice in Wonderland.” 

Away the two of them went, lickety-split, down 
a hillside and up another to the crest and over it. 

Right there, just on the other side Guess 

what! There was a group of children, at least 
a dozen, all of the boys in blue jumpers and the 
girls in blue Kate Greenaway dresses, and they 
were gathered around one of the boys who was 
a little bigger than the others; even bigger than 
John. He was talking quite excitedly, and 
Martha Mary stood, fascinated, watching him 
and quite forgot little Mr. Squirrel, who had by 
this time completely disappeared up a tree. 
Finally the big boy saw Martha Mary and took 
off his hat and said, “Hullo!” 

“Hullo!” said Martha Mary. 

Again the boy said, “Hullo!” and looked at 
the tips of his shoes; then suddenly he smiled 
a perfectly good smile and said: 

“Perhaps you could tell us?” 

“ Please, what? ” asked Martha Mary. 

“ We are hunting for wild violets and there 


114f LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

don’t seem to be any. Do you know where they 
grow? ” 

Of course Martha Mary knew. There were 
oodles and oodles of them on the Sherman Place, 
just at the edge of the lake Ocean. She thought 
it would be lovely to bring all of the children 
home to pick them and perhaps, if there was 
enough, to have tea. 

“Wouldn’t your Mother care?” asked the 
big boy. “ Or are you like us? Haven’t you 
one? ” 

Martha Mary could hardly believe her ears. 
“Haven’t any of you mothers?” she asked. 

“ Nope,” said the boy. “ Nor fathers, either.” 

“How awful!” said Martha Mary. “Where 
do you live? Who takes care of you?” 

“We live at the Charity,” said the boy. “We 
take care of ourselves, excepting at meal-time or 
lessons.” 

“How nice!” said Martha Mary. “Can any- 
one live there?” 

“ Yes,” said the boy, “ if you are an orphan. 
But it’s not nice. No one takes an interest or 
anything in you. The only excitement is when 


MARTHA MARY SEEKS ADVENTURE 115 

ladies with eyeglasses on sticks come from the 
Affiliated Charities to pat you on the head and 
say, ‘ Dear little shaver,’ and make you want 
to run away.” 

“ And they look to see if your ears are clean,” 
said one little girl. 

“ And ask if you are good and say your pray- 
ers,” said another. 

“ And of course we say ‘ Yes,’ ” said the big 
boy, “ and then they give us pennies and tell us 
to save them and we will he rich when we grow 
up.” 

It’s not true,” said Martha Mary. “ You 
always spend them before you grow up. Things 
are very expensive! I know! ” 

Then they remembered the violets, so down the 
hills and to the road they scampered, Martha 
Mary at the head of the lot (to be exact, there 
were six boys and eight girls). Through the 
gates and up to the house she took them to in- 
troduce them to Mother Dear, who was still feel- 
ing pretty badly at the way Walter had behaved. 
When she saw Martha Mary with all her com- 
pany she dropped her sewing and said: 


116 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

“What in the world has the child done?” 

Martha Mary told her as quickly as she could 
all about their being orphans and about the violets 
and the affiliated ladies who gave them pennies 
to save. Mother Dear’s eyes grew soft in the 
way they have and she kissed Martha Mary and 
shook hands with the children, no matter how dirty 
they were. She told Martha Mary to take them 
to the violets by the lake and not let them fall 
in, for some of them were quite small and liable 
to. Martha Mary promised, then called Edward 
Lee and John and they brought along Walter, 
who was now in a sensible frame of mind. John 
was inclined to be standoffish until Martha Mary, 
who knew him like a book, told him that the big- 
gest little boy liked men better than women, and 
then John became quite nice. 

In a little while Martha Mary had learned the 
names of all the orphans, and I’ll tell them to 
you, although you’ll no doubt forget. 

First there was the biggest little boy; he was 
called “ Slats,” because he was thin. The Home 
name for him was Thomas Dome. Then there 
was the biggest little girl, Helen Dolittle, and then 


MARTHA MARY SEEKS ADVENTURE 117 

Reddy Smith and Sammy O’Reilly and Sue Pa- 
tience Grey and John Shaw and Margaret some- 
thing — ^her parents had died before she was able 
to find out what the last name was — ^and Pansy 
and Amy Rebecca Isaacs and Skinny Dawson and 
Patrick O’Harahan, and finally the most adorable 
little golden-haired girl I have ever seen and her 
name was awful. It was Dolcerina Vennicci, but 
they called her “ Piffy.” 

Away went the eighteen children to the edge 
of the lake, where there were so many violets 
under the green leaves that everyone fell to pick- 
ing and became too busy to talk. After a while, 
when hats and arms and aprons were full of flow- 
ers, Martha Mary said: 

“ Let’s play.” 

“ Play skin the Fox,” said Skinny Dawson. 

Ich tee goo,” said Piffy. “ Ich tee goo ” means 
something like “ Oof ” or “ Horrid ” or “ Dirty ” 
or “ Creepy ” or “ Slimy.” So you could tell what 
she meant, although I confess it’s hard to find the 
word that explains it. 

“ We’ll play ring around a rosy,” said Amy 
Rebecca. 


118 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


“ Sissy game ! ” said Slats. 

“ I have an idea,” said Martha Mary. “ We’ll 
have a story.” 

“ Can you tell them? ” asked Sue Patience. 

“ No — not exactly, but Flip can. Perfectly 
wonderful ones!” 

“ Who is Flip? ” they all wanted to know. 

“ I’ll show you,” said Martha Mary. Away 
she rushed and in a moment she was hack, drag- 
ging Flip after her and he holding in his hand 
the pages of a letter from Jane that he had not 
had half time enough to read twice. 

“Hullo, You!” he said to them all, without 
waiting for an introduction. You see. Mother 
Dear had told him that they were there and that 
he must be nice. 

“What do you want?” 

“ We want a story! ” they all shouted. 

Flip turned to Martha Mary and struck a pose 
like an old-time actor. 

“Alas! Madam,” he said, “my fame precedes 
me. I fain would accommodate you, but it wearies 
me to ever seek new plots.” 

“ Don’t be hateful,” said Martha Mary. 


MARTHA MARY SEEKS ADVENTURE 119 

“ ’Tis well,” said Flip. “ What nature of story 
do you desire?” 

They all shouted at once: “Pirates — dolls — 
fairies — ghosts — love — shipwreck — creepy — 

bloody ” until you couldn’t tell who was 

talking. 

“Wait!” roared Flip. “You can’t expect me 
to think if you don’t be quiet. I’m going to tell 
just the kind of a story I wish and, if you don’t 
like it, you can go jump in the lake and drown. 
But I hope you won’t, because then I’ll be in- 
sulted.” 

This is the story he told them: 


CHAPTER XII 


IN WHICH ANOTHER JOHN AND ANOTHER MARY 
WANDER FURTHER FROM HOME THAN THEY 
EVER HAVE BEEN BEFORE, AND FIND A MAR- 
VELOUS BALL OF GLASS, IN WHICH ONE SEES 
THE STRANGEST THINGS 

‘‘ Way off in the furthest corner of San Fran- 
cisco, just where the sun comes over to light up 
the bay, there is a hill. Of course there are many 
other hills in San Francisco, but none of them 
quite so important as Russian Hill. You see, the 
families who live there are quieter and happier 
and more old-fashioned than those in other parts 
of the city. I don’t know why; they just are. 
Right at the steepest part of the hill, and you 
can believe me when I tell you the Hill is steep, 
there is a Spanish Castle; not a really and truly 
one, but just exactly as nice as though it were. 
No one lived in it, nor had for several years, ex- 
cepting an old, white-haired caretaker; a splendid 

120 


THE MARVELOUS BALL OF GLASS 1^1 

man. He liked children. That is why John and 
Mary were allowed in the Castle so much. John 
was a rather spoiled, selfish boy who lived in 
the Mansion next to the Castle, with his married 
sister. Mary was his best friend. She had 
freckles and you would have liked her. They 
played nice games up on the Hill; dozens of fas- 
cinating make-believes that you never would have 
thought of. They fought pirates — oodles of them 
— and baked potatoes in ovens under the rock and 
did other things just as nice. 

“ But, just like other children, they grew tired 
of these things at times and wanted something 
new. So one day, when there were no potatoes 
left, Mary suggested going down the Hill. John 
did not like to; he hated to go where there were 
other people. Mary laughed at him and told him 
he was a sissy, although he wasn’t really. He 
became ashamed of her taunts, so down the Hill 
they went. First you go down some lovely old 
steps cut right in the stone, then you come to 
another hill so steep that it is easier to lie down 
and roll than to walk. They must have gone at 


122 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

least six blocks when, all at once, Mary said to 
John: 

“ ‘ We are not in San Francisco any more.’ 

“ ‘ Where are we, then? ’ asked John. 

“‘We are in China.’ 

“They were not really; they were in China- 
town, but it looked like another city, altogether. 
There were hundreds of Chinamen shuffling along 
the street, with long pig-tails and funny, large 
pipes in their mouths. They talked in a queer 
sing-song, the funniest language you have ever 
heard. There were Chinese women with gold 
jewelry and green jade in their hair, and the most 
adorable little Chinese babies, who looked like 
dolls, dressed in splendid colored silks. Up on 
a balcony, where there were a dozen brightly 
lighted lanterns, a Chinese musician was playing 
upon an instrument that sounded like dying pigs 
and broken drums and tin whistles. In the shop- 
windows there were white lilies and flaming 
oriental silks and queer toys. Also there were 
skinned pigs and skinned chickens and strings of 
bacon hanging from nails. 

“ J ohn and Mary became so interested that they 


THE MARVELOUS BALL OF GLASS 123 

forgot all about going home. Before they knew 
it, darkness had fallen, lanterns on the balconies 
were lighted, and Chinatown looked like Fairy- 
land. 

“ Down the street came a tall, fine-looking 
Chinaman, in loose, blue silk trousers and a blue 
silk coat with black embroidery. He seemed very 
much surprised to find two American children in 
Chinatown at that time of night. He came to 
them and said, in even better English than I use: 

‘‘ ‘ I assume that your small selves are lost. Is 
it not so? ’ 

‘‘ ‘ Not exactly,’ said Mary, who was always 
the spokesman. ‘ You see, we came for a walk 
and just sort of stumbled into Fairyland and now 
we don’t want to go home.’ 

‘‘ ‘ But your August Parent? Will he not be 
worried? ’ 

“ ‘ Yes,’ said Mary, ‘ although John’s sister will 
not mind.’ 

“ ‘ So,’ said the Chinaman. ‘ Well, perhaps, if 
we were to ’phone to the August Parent, he might 
feel relief. Then we could perhaps have tea and 
ginger before returning.’ 


IM LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

“ ‘ That would be lovely/ said Mary, and, 
‘ Great,’ said John. 

“ So the Chinaman stepped into a store and 
’phoned to Mr. Devine, Mary’s father. 

“‘This is Fong Kee, Doctor of Law of the 
Hong Kong University,’ he said. ‘ I have just 
found young John and Mary enjoying the sights 
of Stockton Street. I beg that you will have no 
worriment, as I shall give them tea and bring 
them home at an early hour.’ 

“ John and Mary could not hear what Mr. 
Devine said, but it must have been satisfactory, 
for Mr. Fong Kee came out of the booth, smiling, 
and took a hand of each of the children. 

“ ‘ Now,’ he said, ‘ we shall visit my worthy 
friend, Fong Charles.’ 

“ They went down a flight of narrow steps into 
a dark basement. There was an odor of punks, 
like one uses on the Fourth of July, and the strong 
breath of China Lilies. In through a latticed 
door went Fong Kee, with Mary and John cling- 
ing to each other’s hands, just the least bit 
frightened. 

“ The room they came to was decorated in beau- 


THE MARVELOUS BALL OF GLASS 125 


tiful golden scrolls of carved wood. At the end 
of the room was a queer wooden man, and at 
his feet was a bowl from which came a long ribbon 
of beautiful blue smoke. On a wooden couch an- 
other Chinaman was resting, smoking a small 
bronze pipe. 

“Fong Kee spoke to him in Chinese and he 
arose and shook hands with John and Mary. 
Then he struck a metal bell and a Chinese slave 
girl appeared. He ordered her to bring tea and 
ginger. Then he turned to John. 

“ ‘ I am the old Fong Charles,’ he said. ‘ More 
years I have lived in San Francisco than there 
are hairs on an old pig’s tail. I welcome you.’ 

“ ‘ You look pretty old,’ said John. ‘ What do 
you do? Are you a cook?’ 

“ ' No,’ smiled Fong Charles. ‘ I am a philoso- 
pher. I dream — and smoke my pipes.’ 

“ ‘ I like nice dreams,’ said Mary. 

“ ‘ So ! ’ said Fong Charles. ' Then, perhaps, 
while we await Sanka, my servant, who is as slow 
as the race of the turtles, I might tell you a dream 
or two.’ 

“ He lifted John and Mary to a black wood 


126 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


table, where they sat, cross-legged, like tailors. 
Then he put between them a small black pedestal, 
on which rested a large, round ball of glass. 

“ ‘ So,’ said Fong Charles. ‘ Into the dream 
glass you must look and the dreams you shall 
see.’ 

“ John and Mary leaned forward and saw in 
the glass hundreds of lovely colors, as though the 
rainbow had broken in it. Then the colors divided 
and circled about like a fairy dance. Softly, oh, 
so very softly! Fong Charles began to speak, in 
his sing-song voice, stopping only to draw at his 
pipe and blow a bit of smoke into the curtains 
above his head. And as he spoke, little by little, 
figures became clear in the glass until John and 
Mary could see the dreams, just as Fong Charles 
told them. There were three dreams he told, 
all quite short and strange: 

The Dream of The GirVs Gift 

“ Out of Ta Chung Sz, which is, August One, 
the Temple of the Bell, came Tchi Niu, the Bell- 
maker. 

“‘Those of you who are pure of heart,’ he 


THE MARVELOUS BALL OF GLASS 127 


called, ‘ bring to me your metal mirrors that I 
may make of them a new bell. Come, my chil- 
dren.’ 

“ They came, many of them and gladly, the 
daughters and the mothers, bearing in their arms 
the mirrors that showed their beauty, for it was 
honorable to give, and what more worthy gift could 
be made than a new bell for the temple? 

“ Tcho-Kow came last and slowly. On the mound 
of mirrors she placed hers and stood aside. Then, 
as the torch was carried to the fire builded to melt 
the mirrors, her heart grew sad, for the mirror 
she had brought was the mirror that had been 
in her mother’s family and her grandmother’s 
family, and the family of many generations be- 
fore that. And so she grew cold with grief and 
cried out. 

“ Slowly the flame3 crept up and slowly the 
mass of metal melted into a river of shining gold. 
But the mirror of Tcho-Kow would not burn, 

‘‘ ‘ How now,’ said Tchi Niu. ‘ The gift burns 
not; you have brought disgrace on your house, 
oh, daughter of a Thousand Lilies, by not giving 
your heart with your gift. How, then, will you 


128 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


redeem yourself in the eyes of Dong, the Great 
Bell?’ 

“ Then was Tcho-Kow smitten with a great re- 
pentance and she longed for the goodwill of Dong. 
So she thought and thus made her gift worthy. 
As the flames crept up about the mass of metal, 
she cast aside her dress and saying: 

“ ‘ Gladly I give myself as gift,’ she stepped 
into the flames and disappeared. Then did the 
flames burn joyfully and the mirror of Tcho- 
Kow melted with the others and Dong was ap- 
peased. 

“Now hangs the bell in Ta Chung Sz, and 
when it is rung to call its song to the world: 

“ ‘ Ko-gnai, Ko-gnai, Ko-gnai,’ it calls, and thus 
renders thanks to Tcho-Kow for her gift.” 

The Dream of Hoa-Tchao 

“ Kiang-Kow-Jin, who dwelled in the body of 
a stork in the Pearl River, was the God of Chil- 
dren. He ruled for a million years and was be- 
loved by all the race of River Men. He ruled 
well and happily and knew no worry. Came a 
year, then, when the Children of the River grew 


THE MARVELOUS BALL OF GLASS 129 


few and Kiang-Kow-Jin grieved. So to him he 
called Chung Li, the girl child, and said to 
her: 

“ ' I grieve because your companions are few. 
What then. Daughter of Wisdom, am I to do?’ 

“ Chung Li knew all things. 

Go to Ta Chung Sz, The Temple of the Bell, 
and pray,’ she said, ‘ that many flowers shall 
grow.’ 

“ To Ta Chung Sz went Kiang-Kow-Jin and 
prayed, and when he came out of the Temple 
all the fields were glad with myriad wondrous 
colored flowers. 

“ ‘ It is Hoa-Tchao, the Birthday of A Hun- 
dred Flowers,’ he said. Then he sought his home 
and slept. 

“ When he had slept and awakened he came 
again to the fields. There played Chung Li with 
many new children. And so Kiang-Kow-Jin 
learned that children are flowers.” 

The Dream of Bo 

“ Bo is the God of The River Fish. His 
home is of glass and seaweed. Yearly came the 


130 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


River Men to make gifts to Bo, for Bo was 
of great greed. One year, with the other Men 
of The River, came Fong Soy, the silk mer- 
chant. 

“ ‘ Bountiful Bo,’ said he, ‘ this year I have no 
gift. The rains have been few and I have sold 
no silks. I have no wealth or fruits to bring 
to you. So, that you will bear well with me, I 
have brought that which I treasure more than Life 
itself.’ 

“ He opened the folds of his dress and out 
stepped Fong Sing, his oldest son. Fong Sing, 
garbed in red, stepped into the waters and dis- 
appeared. Then, though parted from his dearest 
possession, Fong Soy returned to his home and 
learned that his wife had given him two sons 
and they were visaged as Bo, the God of The 
River.” 

“ Slowly the forms in the crystal ball disap- 
peared and Fong Charles stopped speaking. John 
and Mary shook themselves as though they had been 
sleeping. Down from the black table Fong Kee 
lifted them, and there, on a small stand, was very 


THE MARVELOUS BALL OF GLASS 131 


black tea in lovely transparent cups. Mary tasted 
it, but it was bitter, so she did not drink. Then 
Sanka, the slave girl, brought dishes with cakes 
and candied gingers and strange fruits and 
almonds. Fong Charles filled the children’s 
pockets, and then Fong Kee led them away. 
Slowly they climbed their Hill and to the door 
of the Mansion. There stood John’s sister and 
Mary’s Father to welcome them, and you may be- 
lieve they were relieved when the children ap- 
peared. They shook hands with Fong Kee and 
made him promise that he would come again to 
the Hill to visit them and perhaps, some time, 
take them again to Fong Charles to look in the 
round glass again.” 

‘‘ Gee, that was a queer story,” said Slats, when 
Flip had finished. 

“ Yes,” said Piffy. “ It made me sleepy.” 

Martha Mary was afraid that the children would 
hurt Flip’s feelings if they said more, so she raced 
them up the lawn to the house, and there on the 
veranda Mother Dear had placed pitchers of lem- 
onade and enough cake for six times eighteen 
children. And so they ate till they could eat no 


132 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

more and then, with their wild violets in their 
arms, went back to the Charity, with Martha 
Mary’s promise that she would come to play with 
them whenever Mother Dear gave her permis- 


sion. 


CHAPTER XIII 


IN WHICH FLIP USES NEEDLESSLY LONG WORDS, 
BUT, TO WIN OUR GOOD-WILL AGAIN, HE TELLS 
A REAL OLD-FASHIONED FAIRY TALE 

For a perfectly good story-teller Flip had some 
rather queer ideas. He didn’t believe in fairy 
tales: that is, the kind that told about witches 
and Godmothers and Princes and such. He said 
he could not explain just why — it had something 
to do with inefBcient education. Of course we 
do not know what “ inefficient education ” is, but 
Father and Mother Dear know, so it must be 
all right. Nevertheless, everyone knows that real 
fairy tales are nice even if they are not efficient 
education, so one night, about an hour before 
bedtime, when the children were all in the living- 
room before the fire, Martha Mary asked if, 
please. Flip would tell one. Flip was in a par- 
ticularly good humor; there had been a thickish 
letter from someone during the day, and of course 

133 


IM LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

the someone was Jane. So he agreed. Only he 
was rather annoying; he started by using need- 
lessly long words that no one understood. He 
said they would have to “ create the right atmos- 
phere.” John said he would, although he didn’t 
know what it meant. But Flip didn’t alone. He 
put out all the lights so that there was only the 
log fire to keep people from bumping. The flames 
really looked like a witch’s fire, only there were no 
witches in the story. Then he heaped cushions on 
the floor for Martha Mary to sit on; Flip had 
been very polite to Martha Mary since Jane’s 
visit. Walter and Edward Lee lay on their stom- 
achs on a rug. Liza was the only one who was 
not there. Flip piled some lovely-smelling pine 
cones on the fire, which sputtered and flamed like 
a blacksmith’s forge, only didn’t smell at all the 
same. 

“ Once, in the days before Mother Dear was 
born, or Mother Dear’s Grandmother, or her 
Grandmother’s Great Grandmother’s Great 
Grandmother, which was many years ago,” said 
Flip, although everyone knew that, “ there lived 
a King whose lands were so great that it took 


A REAL OLD-FASHIONED FAIRY TALE 135 

the birds a whole month to fly across them. He 
was the richest king who lived in the days of 
the fairies. His chests were of the finest gold, 
lined with purple satin, and in them were so 
many beautiful emeralds and rubies that it would 
hurt your eyes to look at them. In his garden 
grew the rarest of flowers; roses that had been 
brought from England and yellowish brown and 
purple orchids from Brazil ; iris, lilac, cherry 
blossoms, and St. Joseph’s lilies were there, too, 
from all the four corners of the earth. In his 
stables there were Arabian horses and splendid 
dogs: deerhounds and greyhounds, and had there 
been St. Bernards in those days, he no doubt 
would have had some of them, too. In the Pal- 
ace there were wonderful ancestral paintings, 
beautiful furniture, table service of pure gold, 
and glass of the rarest cut. Best of all, there 
was his very dear Queen Wife and the little 
prince who would be King when he grew up. It 
was the sunniest of days when the prince came. 
The Queen Mother had longed for a son and 
heir for a very long time. She dreamed one night 
that when the King had grown to love her very 


136 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


much she would be given a son; you know, there 
can only be children where there is love. The 
dream made her more pure and lovely than ever; 
her thoughts and her ways so delighted the King 
that he learned to love her more than he thought 
a mortal could love. And so, just as the rose- 
bush grows until it is lovely and old and wise 
enough to be a mother, and then the seed develops 
in it under the petals and finally wins strength 
and goes away on the breeze to take root for it- 
self and become a rose child, so the seed was born 
within the Mother Queen. While it was gaining 
strength within her, she kept her thought cheerful 
and clean, so that when her child came he would 
be cheerful and clean always. Then came the sun- 
niest of days; just the day for a Prince’s birth, 
and early in the morning the King was allowed 
to come to his wife’s room and there, beside 
her, on a soft little cushion, was his son, the 
Prince. 

“ You can well believe that the King was filled 
with gladness. He went to the balcony of the 
Palace with the tiny baby in his arm and held it 
up so that all the subjects could see it. They 


A REAL OLD-FASHIONED FAIRY TALE 137 


cheered and the bronze church bells rang and 
there was gladness throughout the kingdom. 

“ From the wisest of the courtiers, guardians 
were chosen for the Prince. There was the chief 
astrologer to teach him the knowledge that was 
in books. The grey-haired old Lord of The Park 
taught him the beauty of flowers and the song 
of the bird, and the Master of The Whip showed 
him the correct way to trot a horse and the man- 
ner in which a King’s son should hold his sword. 
So, surrounded by wealth and the dearest of par- 
ents and the wisest of teachers. Prince Winfred 
grew strong and wise. At the time of my story 
he was about ten years old, the flnest young prince 
you have ever seen, only of course you have never 
seen a prince. 

“ You would think that, with all his wealth 
and splendor, he would be perfectly happy, but 
he wasn’t. You see, one day he was riding down 
the Park road on his white horse and he saw 
through the Castle gates a farmer’s hoy pass by 
on a burro. It was a perfectly good, young grey 
burro with a collar of wild flowers and tinkling 
bells hanging from it. As soon as Winfred saw 


138 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

it he knew that he did not have everything in 
the world. He made up his mind that he wanted 
a burro very much. He told his wish to old Esau, 
the astrologer, but Esau raised his hands in horror 
and said it would be disgraceful and undignified 
for His Grace to ride a burro. He would speak 
to the Master of The Whip, he said, and order 
new horses. That was not what the Prince wished 
for; he had plenty of horses already. He did 
not know just why he wanted a burro; personally, 
I think I can guess. There was something simple 
and modest in the small creature that would have 
been a welcome change from the show and pomp 
of the Castle. So Winfred went to the Lord 
of The Park and told him his desire; that proud 
official sneered rather disrespectfully and said: 

“‘Perhaps Your Highness desires a goat, too, 
to milk when you tire of the burro.’ 

“ Winfred almost lost his temper, but he re- 
membered that Princes had to be dignified, so he 
went to his father, the King, and in a most proper 
fashion, said: 

Your Majesty, I have a request to make.’ 

“ It pleased the King to be asked favors by 


A REAL OLD-FASHIONED FAIRY TALE 139 

his son, and so he smiled and demanded what it 
might be. 

“ ‘ If it please you, Sire,’ said Winfred, ‘ I 
would like a burro.’ 

“‘A burro?’ said the King. ‘What will you 
do with a burro? ’ 

“ ‘ Ride him,’ said Winfred. 

“ At first the King laughed at the idea of see- 
ing his son and heir astride a donkey, but when 
he found that the boy was serious he went into 
a rage and Winfred crept away, miserable and 
frightened. Out into the Park he went and lay 
down under a large oak, where he wept in a 
most unprincely manner. He wept until the tears 
were smeared all over his silk collar and ran 
down his neck. You should have seen him; one 
would never have guessed that it was a prince 
sprawled there, for all the world like a badly 
trained baby. He really was unhappy, though, 
so you could not blame him altogether. 

“ He cried and cried until he heard a rustling 
above him in the tree. He looked up, and perched 
on a branch just above his head was a small per- 
son, not a great deal larger than a pocket-knife. 


140 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


It was a girl-person, dressed in bright green, 
with the tiniest of green hats on her bit of sunny 
hair. She looked down at Winfred and frowned. 

“‘What do you want?’ demanded Winfred. 

“ ‘ Stop crying,’ said the girl-person. 

“ ‘ You are disrespectful,’ said Winfred. ‘ I am 
the Prince.’ 

“ ‘ I don’t care who you are,’ said the girl- 
person. ‘ I wish you would stop crying.’ 

“ Winfred was so surprised at her lack of re- 
spect that he forgot to cry for a moment, but 
he soon began again. 

“ ‘ Stop it, I say,’ said the little thing. ‘ Stop 
it! I hate you when you do that.’ 

“ Winfred cried on. 

“ Then the girl-person commenced to coax. 
‘ Please,’ she said, ‘ stop and I will give you any 
wish you ask of me.’ 

“ ‘ Why should I stop? ’ asked Winfred. ‘ And 
who are you that you can grant wishes to a 
prince ? ’ 

“ ‘ You should stop,’ said the girl-person, ‘ be- 
cause I hate tears, and I can grant wishes, be- 
cause I am a fairy.’ 


A REAL OLD-FASHIONED FAIRY TALE 141 

That is very nice/ said Winfred. ‘ IVe 
always wished to meet a fairy. Are they all like 
you? ’ 

“ ‘ Silly/ said the fairy. ‘ Of course not. I 
am the laughter fairy; I go about the world col- 
lecting children’s smiles and giving them to solemn 
grown-ups. I’m much nicer than most of the 
fairies; I think I am the nicest fairy there ever 
was.’ 

“ ‘ You conceited creature/ said Winfred. ‘ You 
are not at all nice.’ 

“ The fairy laughed and reached down a tiny 
foot and kicked Winfred in the nose. 

“ ‘ Don’t be stupid/ she said. ‘ I didn’t really 
mean that. There are other fairies as nice — al- 
most — as I am. And I’m not a creature and I 
wish you wouldn’t call me one. I’m a fairy and 
my name is — guess what? ’ 

“ ‘ Christine/ guesses Winfred. 

“ ‘ How silly! Christine is not a fairy name at 
all. Christines are always fat and good cooks. 
My name is Merrylip. Do you like it? ’ 

“ ‘ Pretty well/ said Winfred. ‘ What does it 
mean? ’ 


142 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

“ ‘ Nothing. It’s just a name, and names never 
mean anything.’ 

Oh! ’ said Winfred. 

“All at once Merrylip commenced to laugh; 
laughed so hard that her little foot got tangled 
in a spider web and she almost ruined the web 
getting loose. 

“ ‘ Stop it,’ said Winfred. ‘ I can’t see any- 
thing funny.’ 

“ ‘ You are funny,’ said Merrylip. 

“‘Why?’ demanded Winfred, and showed 
signs of remembering that he was the King’s son 
and entitled to respect. 

“ ‘ Because,’ said Merrylip. 

“ ‘ Because what? ’ 

“ ‘ Because I asked you to stop crying and I 
talked to you a little and you had to stop.’ 

Didn’t. I stopped because you said you 
would grant me a wish.’ 

“ ‘ I forgot,’ said Merrylip. ‘ What do you 
want? ’ 

“ In a flash Winfred remembered what he 
wanted more than anything else in the world. 

“ ‘ Please — a burro,’ he said. 


A REAL OLD-FASHIONED FAIRY TALE 143 

“‘A burro?’ said Merry lip, much surprised. 
‘ Why in the world do you waste a good 
wish on a burro? There are much nicer 
things than that to ask for. Wish, why don’t 
you, for heaps of money, and then you can buy 
anything! ’ 

“ ‘ I have plenty of money,’ said Winfred. 
‘ And all the treasures I want. But a burro is 
different. You can’t just buy them; you have 
to be bom not a prince to have one. I wish I 
was a train-engineeer or a policeman or a farm- 
hand. A prince has so many duties that it is tire- 
some. When I am King I shall have a whole 
stable full of burros.’ 

“ ‘ Then you won’t enjoy them at all,’ said 
Merrylip. She was really wise for such a small 
fairy. ‘ You’ll get tired of them. People always 
do when they have finally got what they wanted 
very much.’ 

‘‘ ‘ I wouldn’t,’ said Winfred. ‘ I am different.’ 

“ ‘ I bet you,’ said Merryhp. 

“ ‘ Bet what? ’ 

“ ‘ Bet I will show you something nicer than 
a burro; even nicer than two burros, You’ll be 


144 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


perfectly happy for two hours — then you’ll want 
to be a prince again and forget everything 
else.’ 

“ ‘ You just say that because you are a girl,’ 
said Winfred. ‘ Girls never understand boys.’ 

“ ‘ I’ll prove it,’ said Merrylip. ‘ Come under 
my cape.’ 

“ ‘ I can’t,’ said Winfred. ‘ I’m too big.’ 

“ ‘ That is easy,’ said Merrylip. ‘ You must kiss 
me on my ear, then see what happens.’ 

“ ‘ Kisses are horrid,’ said Winfred. Still he 
was not going to take any chances of not having 
his wish, so he reached up and just put the small- 
est kind of a kiss on Merrylip’s ear. It tasted 
like marshmallows. As soon as he touched her, 
Winfred began to grow small. You have never 
seen a boy as small as he became — about so big. 
Then he climbed up and drew Merrylip’s cape over 
him and away they went. Up over the very tops 
of the trees, out across the Castle wall, down into 
the valley, pop over a stream, high again so as 
not to bump into a fat old oak, and — ^before you 
knew it — they were right above the city. Far be- 
low them were the people, walking about, and 


A REAL OLD-FASHIONED FAIRY TALE 145 

they didn’t, any of them, look larger than Merry- 
lip. 

Now,’ said Merrylip. ‘ Be ready! ’ 

“ Down they swooped right to the middle of 
the street, where a whole dozen children were 
playing London Bridges. They were rather dirty 
children; their clothes were not at all nice and 
their hair was mussed. As soon as the Prince’s 
feet touched the cobblestones, he became his natu- 
ral size. Merrylip disappeared altogether, but 
Winfred heard her buzzing about his ear, telling 
him what to do. 

“ You can imagine how surprised all the chil- 
dren were when they found that a strange boy 
had popped up out of nowhere. They gathered 
around him and shouted, ‘ Who are you? ’ 

“ Winfred was going to say, ‘ The King’s Son,’ 
but Merrylip whispered in his ear, so he just 
said, ‘ Winfred.’ 

“ The children didn’t care very much who he 
was, after all. You see, Merrylip had touched 
his clothes with her lavender stick and they had 
become old and dirty just like those of the others. 
They dedded that they would start another game: 


146 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


Rum-ba-loo-pum-ba-loo. The oldest of them 
counted out loud: 

“ ‘ Eny, meny, miny, mo. Catch a fairy by the 
toe. If he hoUers let him go. Fairy, meny, miny, 
mo. 0-U-T spells out, with the Old Mother 
Witch’s hat turned in — side — out.’ And Winfred 
was out. 

“ ‘ But I don’t know how to play,’ said Winfred. 

‘“It’s perfectly easy!’ they shouted. ‘You 
know, the one who is out is It.’ 

“ ‘ How can you be It if you are Out? ’ asked 
Winfred. 

“ They couldn’t explain, but that was the way 
it was played. The one who was Out was It, and 
he or she was called Mrs. Rumbaloopumbaloo. 
She had to be the old witch and live on a stump of 
a tree. That was all the home she had. Then 
the children came up and said: 

“ ‘ Mother Rumbaloopumbaloo, what are you 
thinking of ? ’ 

“ Rumbaloopumbaloo would say the first let- 
ter of the word. If it was ice cream, she would 
say ‘ I ’ ; if it was music, she would say ‘ M,’ and 
so on. Then, if one of the children guessed right. 


A REAL OLD-FASHIONED FAIRY TALE 14.7 

Mother Rumbaloopumbaloo would chase them all 
and the one who was caught was It, 

“ Up to Winfred came the children and said : 

Mother Rumbaloopumbaloo, what are you 
thinking of? ’ 

“ ‘ It begins with B/ said Winfred. 

“ ‘ Books/ said one. 

“ ‘ Nope.’ 

“‘BeUs?’ 

“ ‘ Nope.’ 

“‘Beans?’ 

“ ‘ No.’ 

“ Then a little girl, whom no one had noticed 
before, said: 

“ ‘ I know. It’s a burro.’ 

“‘Uhu!’ shouted Winfred, and chased them 
down the street. He caught the little girl who 
had guessed rightly and whispered to her: 

“ ‘ How did you know? ’ 

“ ‘ Silly, silly,’ said the girl, for it was Merry- 
lip, grown big. 

“ They played for a very long time, and Win- 
fred was never so happy before. 


148 LADY RtfMDlDOODLEDUM^S CHiLDREN 


“ ‘ Isn’t this nicer than a burro? ’ asked Merry- 
lip, and Winfred said: 

“ ‘ A thousand times nicer.’ 

“ After a while they all were tired and didn’t 
think the game was fun any more, so they took 
up their hats and started for home. 

“ ‘ You can come home with me for lunch if 
you want,’ said one of the boys to Winfred. Win- 
fred whispered to Merry lip, and she said he might, 
so they went. Only Merrylip made herself small 
again and hid in the Prince’s pocket. They came 
to a small hut, and the boy, whose name was 
Michael, rushed in with Winfred after him. They 
threw their hats on a chair and shouted, and in 
came a woman, all fat and grey, with a gingham 
apron. Michael jumped into her arms and 
shouted : ‘ Mother, I’ve brought a boy to lunch. 
His name is Winfred.’ 

“ The fat Mother kissed Winfred ; then they 
sat down in the kitchen and had oodles of beans 
and black bread. 

“ ‘ Isn’t this nicer than burros? ’ whispered Mer- 
rylip. 

“ ‘ A thousand times nicer,’ whispered Winfred. 


A REAL OLD-FASHIONED FAlRlT TALE 149 

And nicer than dinner at home with serv- 
ants all about?’ 

“ ‘ A thousand times nicer.’ 

“ When they couldn’t eat any more, the old 
Mother went to sleep in her chair, and Winfred 
said good-by to Michael and went out. 

“ ‘ Where now? ’ he asked Merrylip. 

Now the best of all,’ she answered. 

“Down the road they went to a large field, 
where a grey burro was eating grass. 

“ ‘ Get on,’ said Merrylip. Winfred patted the 
burro on the nose, then chmbed up. Away they 
went, much faster than burros usually travel, rush- 
ing across the fields till the wind hummed about 
Winfred’s ears like music. They galloped up 
across the hills and down into new grass valleys 
that Winfred had never seen before. 

“ ‘ Isn’t this nice? ’ shouted Merrylip. 

“ ‘ There is nothing nicer in the world!’ Win- 
fred shouted back. 

“ ‘ Silly,’ said Merrylip. 

“ On and on they rode until Winfred grew 
tired. 

“ ‘ Please,’ he said, ‘ I would like to stop, now.’ 


150 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

“ Immediately the burro disappeared and Win- 
fred was standing under a tree, with Merry lip 
next to him. 

‘ Where do you want to go now? ’ she asked. 

“ * I’m hungry,’ said Winfred. 

“ ‘ Shall we go to the old Mother’s and have 
more beans? ’ 

“ ‘ I’d rather have fried chicken and strawber- 
ries,’ said Winfred. 

“ ‘ But the old Mother only eats beans.’ 

“ ‘ I can eat at home,’ said Winfred. 

“ ‘ I’m tired of burros.’ 

“ ‘ Don’t you want to go back and play with 
the children? ’ 

“ ‘ No, they were dirty and disrespectful.’ 

“ ‘ You are horrid,’ said Merrylip. ‘ But I knew ^ 
you would be this way.’ 

“ She thought a moment, frowning the tiniest, 
most adorable frown. 

“ Then, ‘ I hate boys,’ she said, ‘ especially self- 
ish ones. I am going to punish you for growing 
tired so quickly of the things you wanted more 
than anything else in the world.’ 

“ All at once there came a rush of wind, and 


A REAL OLD-FASHIONED FAIRY TALE 151 

Winfred was alone, and, to his horror, as tiny as 
a string bean. 

“ ‘ Merrylip ! ’ he called. ‘Don’t leave me 
alone! I am frightened.’ 

“ But there was no answer. 

“Again he called; ‘I can’t go home if you 
don’t come! My feet are so small and my legs so 
tiny that I never would get there ! ’ 

“ Still there was no answer. 

“So how do you think he got home?” 

None of the children could guess. 

“ Well,” said Flip, “ it is nine o’clock and you 
all ought to be in bed. So I’m not going to tell 
you another word, and there will be a second 
chapter to-morrow night.” 

“Please, please!” the children all shouted. 
“ We want to know now.” 

“Not a word,” said Flip. 

Then suddenly Walter sprang on to Flip’s 
stomach and Edward Lee sat on his face and 
Walter shouted for help. John got a rope, and 
with the aid of Martha Mary they tied Flip to 
the leg of the library table. The noise was some- 


152 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

thing terrific. In rushed Mother Dear and Father. 

“Here, here!’’ said Father. “What is the 
noise about?” 

“ Please,” said Martha Mary, “ Walter is a 
hero and Flip is a villain.” 

Then Mother Dear laughed, and when Mother 
laughs Father always laughs, too. It really is 
quite funny to see Mother laugh. She is becom- 
ing just the least bit stout. Well, when Father 
laughed, the children jumped on him, too, and 
tied him to another leg of the table. Father tried 
to look scandalized, but you could see a laugh 
lurking out of the corner of his mouth. 

Said he, “ I consider this very undignified.” 

“ No,” said Walter, “ it is jail. You have to 
give bail before you can get out.” 

“ And may I ask how much the bail is? ” asked 
Father, digging his hand into his money pocket. 

“ It’s not that kind of a bail,” said Edward Lee. 
“ Mother Dear, what shall the bail be? ” 

Mother Dear had a splendid idea. “ We’ll pun- 
ish Father,” she said, “ by making Flip sing, and 
punish Flip by making Father sing.” 

Father did not want to, but the children would 


A REAL OLD-FASHIONED FAIRY TALE 153 

not let him go, so he sang in an awful, awful 
voice : 

‘‘ There once was a silly old whale 
Who drowned himself in a pail. 

Amongst folks it is said 
There was room for his head. 

But not the least bit for his tail.” 

“Oh, oh!’’ moaned Flip. “Spare me, spare 
me!” 

So they spared him, but made him sing to 
torture Father. Then it was the most surprising 
thing. He sang in the softest, nicest voice, a 
voice that just seemed to fit in with the firelight 
and the “ atmosphere 

‘‘ Way up above the blackest trees that tease the sky at 
night 

A million young star children dance a merry, fairy dance. 
The fat old moon comes through the clouds and giggles 
with delight 

To see the myriad youngsters as they skip and hop and 
prance. 

Then, when the night is growing old and skies are fading 
grey 

A mother star comes softly out a lullaby to hum. 

She warns the dancing children of the coming of the day, 
For a very careful Mother is Mrs. Rumdidoodledum.” 


154 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

Then the children looked out of the window and, 
sure enough, Lady Rumdidoodledum was just ap- 
pearing, big and bright, above the pine trees. 

“ Flip,” coaxed Martha Mary, “ don’t you think 
you could tell us just a bit of how Winfred got 
home?” 

“ To-morrow night,” said Flip, and so every- 
one said good night and went to bed. 


CHAPTER XIV 


IN WHICH WINFRED IS GIVEN THE MOST WONDER- 
FUL WISH IN THE WORLD, AND I ADVISE YOU 
ALL TO READ IT AND LEARN WHAT IT IS, SO 
THAT IF, SOME DAY WHEN YOU ARE LEAST EX- 
PECTING IT, A FAIRY COMES AND OFFERS YOU 
A WISH, YOU WILL KNOW FOR WHAT TO ASK 

The following day came a surprise for the 
children. While they were at their lessons Mother 
Dear constantly looked at her watch and then 
gazed out of the window. Martha Mary was sure 
something was going to happen, but she could 
not for a moment imagine what it was to be. 
Finally Mother Dear could keep the secret no 
longer. 

“ Babes,” she said, “ you may all put away your 
books, and then I have something to tell you.” 

“Is it nice?” asked Edward Lee. 

“ Yes — and no,” said Mother. “ I want you to 
be happy about it and be nice to Flip. You 

5 > 


see- 


155 


156 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

Martha Mary’s lips began to tremble. She 
came to Mother and hid her face in her lap so 
that the boys could not see her eyes. Mother 
Dear smoothed the long curls that fell over 
Martha Mary’s shoulders and patted her cheeks, 
just as you would a baby’s. The boys did not 
know what to think. 

Finally Martha Mary looked up and smiled the 
most unhappy little smile imaginable, because 
it was hard to make-believe. 

“ I know,” she said. “ I just knew it had to 
happen.” 

“ What, Dear? ” asked Mother. 

“He is going away; I am sure he is.” 

Mother Dear’s eyes were all watery. “ Yes,” 
she said, “ but you must not be selfish. Flip is 
going to be very, very happy.” 

“ I suppose it is the Jane-person,” grunted 
John. 

Mother Dear frowned a little and then smiled 
a perfectly good smile. 

“ It is the Jane-person,” she said, “ and I am 
happy as happy can be. You see. Flip has re- 
ceived a great deal of money for his book and so 


THE MOST WONDERFUL WISH 157 

the publisher wants him to come to New York to 
discuss the work he is to do from now on. And 
so Flip is going — going in a few weeks, but first 
he is going to the City and he and Jane are to 
be married, and John and Martha Mary are going 
with Father and myself to the wedding. So, you 
see, it is to be nice, after all.” 

“ And,” said Liza, “ isn’t my Flip ever, ever 
going to come back no more?” 

‘‘ Certainly, Butterfly! In much less than a 
year he will return.” 

“ And live here? ” 

Mother smiled. ‘‘ I’m afraid not. But he is 
to have a lovely cottage just a short distance down 

the road and Ssh! Flip is coming. I want 

you to be very nice to him and not say anything 
about what I have told you.” 

Flip came in with a perfectly happy smile. Im- 
mediately he saw that something was wrong. The 
children were always more noisy when he came. 
But he looked at Mother Dear and she nodded, 
so he pretended to notice nothing. 

Well, I’m here,” he said. ‘‘ Supposing we 
find out now what happened to Winfred.” 


158 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

“Yes!” the children shouted, forgetting for 
the moment that it might be the last story he 
would tell them in a long time. (Personally, I 
know that it wasn’t.) 

“Well,” said Flip (he always said “ WeU ” 
when he started to speak) , “ I’ll tell you, and 
please, Martha Mary, will you sit on my knee 
just this once while I tell it?” 

Martha Mary came and climbed to his knee 
just like a baby and hid her face in his big coat, 
because she was afraid of crying. Then Flip 
coughed to clear his throat and told the second 
chapter of Winfred’s story: 

“Now, let me see! Winfred was standing in 
the middle of the field, alone, and he was no 
larger than a string bean. Every time a small 
breeze came along it picked him up, just like 
a leaf, and carried him to another part of the 
field. That was rather good fun at first, but after 
a while it was unpleasant to have to fly whether 
you would or not. So Winfred crept under a 
wild rosebush and hid in the leaves, where he could 
think without being disturbed. But thinking did 
not do any good, for that would not make him 


THE MOST WONDERFUL WISH 159 

large again. He sat with his tiny face in his 
hands and frowned. Then the sky grew dark 
and it was night. Lady Rumdidoodledum and 
thousands of star children came into the sky and 
the moon appeared like the largest gold plate you 
have ever seen. Soon voices were heard in the 
field — voices of people calling and shouting, 
‘ Prince Winfred ! ’ They were the guards seeking 
the lost boy. They tramped here and there and 
everywhere and could not hear when Winfred 
answered them, for his voice was as small as his 
body. Once a guard came along, swinging a blue 
lantern, and he almost stepped on Winfred. 
Finally they said he could not be in that field, 
so they went ahead, the men shouting and blow- 
ing trumpets, and the women calling and moan- 
ing. Last of all came the Queen Mother. She 
did not speak or cry, but walked with her head 
bowed and tears in her eyes. Winfred held out 
his arms and called, ‘ Mother Dearest ! ’ but she 
could not see or hear him. And so she passed out 
of sight with the others. Then Winfred crept 
out from the wild rosebush and commenced to 
climb the hill. It was a hard climb for his short 


160 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

legs and he was very much out of breath when 
he reached the top. He rested a moment and 
then looked down. Far below him he saw the 
ocean, grey and cold, and very great, reaching 
all the way to the shores of Japan. Along the 
beach the huge waves splashed like white horses. 
The winds came skipping across the waters, 
mussing them in all directions. Winfred gasped, 
for he had never seen the ocean before. Then, 
suddenly, he remembered — (and this is true, I as- 
sure you) the first time you see or do anything, 
such as eating the first grape of the season, or 
seeing the first firefly, or anything like that, if 
you make a wish it is sure to come true. So 
Winfred reached out his arms to the sea and 
whispered : 

‘‘ ‘ Oh, ocean blue, oh, ocean grey, 

I’ve never seen you before to-day. 

Grant to me, oh, grant, I pray. 

The wish I wish to you to-day.’ 

“ Out of the wildest of the waves skipped a 
tiny veil of blue, waving and swaying across the 
sky like a bit of smoke. Straight to Winfred it 
came and fluttered to his feet. Then he saw that 


THE MOST WONDERFUL WISH 16.1 

it was a sprite, a tiny blue one, no larger than him- 
self. The water sprite was dressed like a Queen’s 
page, all golden and blue, and he carried the 
smallest imaginable trumpet in his hand. He took 
off his hat and bowed. 

“ ‘ Prince Winfred,’ he said, ‘ I have come from 
the salty sea with a message for you.’ 

“ ‘ I saw you coming,’ said Winfred. ‘ I should 
think you would lose your breath when you travel 
through the water.’ 

“ ‘ One does,’ said the sprite, ‘ if one keeps one’s 
mouth open. But I breathe through my ears. 
Why don’t you try it? ’ 

“ Winfred tried, but he couldn’t. 

“‘Please,’ he said, ‘what is your message?’ 

“ ‘ I am Lovelight, the messenger of Eung Nep- 
tune who rules the ocean,’ said the sprite. ‘ King 
Neptune’ (he said ‘King’ like ‘kink’) ‘heard 
your wish and he says that he will grant it, be- 
cause he likes to have people believe in him. What 
will you wish? ’ 

“ ‘ I wish ’ said Winfred. 

“‘Wait!’ said Lovelight. ‘Don’t be silly and 


162 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


wish for something that is not worth while. And, 
for Goodness’ Sake, don’t wish for a burro! ’ 

“ ‘ How did you know about that? ’ asked Win- 
fred. 

“ Why, as soon as Merrylip left you she came 
straight to the sea to tell all the waves and col- 
lect laughs from them. When they heard that 
a Eng’s Son had asked for a burro, they laughed 
so hard that the sailors all thought a storm was 
coming up.’ 

“ ‘ I could choke Merrylip,’ said Winfred, al- 
though he laughed himself. ‘ But,’ said he, 
‘ I do not know how to make a worth-while 
wish.’ 

“ Lovelight came close and put his lips to Win- 
fred’s ear. 

“ ‘ There is one wish,’ he said, ‘ that is more 
wonderful than anything else in the world. Shall 
I tell it to you? ’ 

“‘Please do!’ 

“ ‘ Well, wish that any wish you make at any 
time, as long as it is sensible, will come true. You 
see, that is really only one wish.’ 

“‘And will it come true?’ 


THE MOST WONDERFUL WISH 


163 


“ ‘ Certainly/ 

“ So again Winfred looked out to the sea and 
said: 

“ ‘ Oh, ocean blue, oh, ocean grey, 

I’ve never seen you before to-day. 

Grant to me, oh, grant, I pray. 

The wish I wish to you to-day 1 ’ 

‘‘ Then he added : ‘ I wish that any wish I make 
at any time will come true as long as it is 
sensible.’ 

“When he stopped, a golden light ran across 
the waters. 

“ ‘ You see,’ said Lovelight, ‘ Neptune is smil- 
ing. He says he will grant your wish. Try 
once ! ’ 

“ ‘ All right,’ said Winfred. ‘ I wish that Mer- 
rylip would come back.’ 

“ Almost immediately Merrylip came skipping 
through the grass, with her golden hair waving 
in the moonlight. Winfred put his arms about 
her and kissed her on the nose. ‘ Please,’ he said, 
‘ I wish, Merrylip, that you would not think me 
hateful any more.’ 

“ ‘ Smile, Silly! ’ said Merrylip. ‘ And I won’t.’ 


164» LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

“ So Winfred smiled and that part of his trou- 
ble was ended. 

“ ‘ Now/ said Lovelight, ‘ I must return to King 
Neptune/ 

“ ‘ I wish you a pleasant journey back/ said 
Winfred. 

“ ‘ Thanks/ said Lovelight, and skipped into the 
sky. 

“ ‘ I wish you would give the King my regards/ 
Winfred called after him, and Lovelight had a 
pleasant journey and gave the King Winfred’s 
regards as soon as he arrived. 

“ ‘ Now,’ said Merrylip, ‘ I don’t suppose you 
will have any more to do with me.’ 

“ ‘ But I will,’ said Winfred. ‘ I don’t suppose 
you will have any more to do with me.’ 

“ He didn’t really mean it to be a wish, al- 
though he wanted it very much, but he forgot 
that every time he said ‘ I wish ’ it would come 
true. So Merrylip stayed and that is why, even 
when he grew up and was King, Winfred always 
smiled. 

“ ‘ Next on the programme is Home,’ said Win- 
fred. ‘ I wish I was my regular size and was 


THE MOST WONDERFUL WISH 


166 


sitting on Mother’s lap and she was singing to me, 
and Merrylip was hiding in my pocket, and things 
were just as though I had never gone away at 
all/ 

“ Almost before he had finished the very long 
sentence, it came true. Winfred found himself 
on his Mother’s knee (although he was a pretty 
big boy to be held that way) and she was press- 
ing her lips on his hair and humming him a Queen 
Song. In his pocket slept Merrylip and no one 
knew it excepting Winfred, because she was so 
tiny that, even when she sneezed, people could 
not hear her. And so everything came out well, 
after all, you see. 

“ Later, Winfred grew to be King, and with his 
wonderful wish made his people the happiest on 
earth, for when anything sensible had to be ar- 
ranged he needed but to wish and it would come 
true. As a matter of fact, it was fortunate that 
Merrylip was always there, for often he thought of 
silly wishes and then Merrylip would pinch his 
ear and he would not make them. And this is 
all.” 

‘‘ Well, it is a relief to know that he got home 


166 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

all right,” said John. John was forming the 
habit of using long words. It would have been 
just as easy for him to say “ glad ” as “ relief.” 

Then Martha Mary climbed off Flip’s knee, 
and he held her hands and she leaned forward and 
whispered in his ear: 

“ I’m sorry as sorry can be. Flip Dear, that 
you are going away, but I am happy because you 
and Jane will be happy.” 

Flip smiled and gazed out of the window, and 
then took Martha Mary into his arms and kissed 
her, and the boys all shouted, and Martha Mary 
rushed from the room, all red and happy. 

And so Flip told the last but one of his stories 
before he went to New York, and, as you shall 
see, the last one I had nothing to do with. 


CHAPTER XV 


IN WHICH^ FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A LONG TIME, 
I DO NOT TALK AT ALL, BUT AM WELL CON- 
TENT TO SIT QUIETLY BY AND LISTEN TO THE 
LOVELY NEWS THAT L. H. D., WHO, YOU WILL 
REMEMBER, I TOLD YOU ABOUT IN THE PREFACE, 
HAS BROUGHT 

One gloriously sunny morning Liza opened her 
grey eyes wide, yawned, and decided that she 
would really stay awake and consider the busi- 
ness of the day. She sat up in her little crib, 
looking adorably pink and white and very hug- 
gable, with her tousled golden curls playing hide 
and seek with each other on her neck. Across the 
room, in her own bed, still sound asleep, lay 
Martha Mary. 

“ Sister Lazy Bones,” thought Butterfly, and 
wondered how anyone could want to sleep when 
Mr. Cock Robin was singing such a splendid 

song in the vines at the windows. Liza looked 

167 


168 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

around the room expectantly, then the corners 
of her mouth drooped pitifully, and a big tear 
rolled down her cheek. For where was Mother 
Dear this beautiful morning? Never before, as 
long as Liza could remember, had she failed to find 
Mother bending over her when she awakened, with 
a big kiss waiting in the corner of her mouth for 
her baby daughter. 

Just at that minute, luckily. Nurse Huggins 
came in, smiling, oh, so happily! Liza, of course, 
just couldn’t help smiling, too, though she had not 
any idea at all why she was so glad. 

“ Please,” said she, “ where’s my Muwer 
Dear?” 

(She never took time to say Mother quite dis- 
tinctly, though she really could if she wanted 
to.) 

Nurse just laughed mysteriously, in the annoy- 
ing way that grown-ups sometimes have, kissed the 
little Butterfly, and bade her get quickly into her 
wrapper and slippers. By this time Martha Mary 
was awake, too, and following Liza’s example. 
In another moment the two children were stand- 
ing before Mother Dear’s door, which was very 


THE NEWS THAT L. H. D. BROUGHT 169 


quietly opened from the inside by a brown-eyed 
lady, dressed all in white, whom they had never 
seen before. Mother lay in the big, four-poster 
bed, looking a little pale and a little tired, but 
oh, so “ smily.” Right next to her was a little 
cradle, all blue lace and ribbons, and inside — 
Guess what! There was a baby, a teeny, tiny bit 
of a one, all red and wrinkled, and not half so big 
as Liza’s doll. At first Martha Mary could only 
look from the big bed to the cradle and then 
back again. Then, when they realized what a 
wonderful present Mother Dear had given them, 
they nearly smothered her with kisses. No one 
said a word, because, you see, when a person is 
really and truly happy they can’t talk much be- 
cause of the choky feeling in their throat. But 
after Martha Mary and Liza had each touched the 
crumpled rose-leaf hands of the new baby, and 
looked into its tiny face, 

‘‘ Please,” said Mary, ‘‘ is it a sister or a 
brother? ” 

Mother laughed, then, — she just couldn’t help 
it. How silly she had been not to have told 
them! 


170 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


“ It’s a sister, Ladykin Dear,” said Father, who 
came into the room just in time to hear the ques- 
tion. “ And she is just as glad to see you as you 
are to see her, only she sleeps so much that she 
hasn’t time to tell you so, herself.” 

While Father was speaking Liza’s eyes had 
grown very wide indeed, for the tiny sister had 
yawned, then opened her eyes, and was looking 
straight at Liza. 

“Muvver Dear! Father!” said she excitedly, 
“ she is going to talk to me.” Then Butterfly’s 
golden curls, which just reached to the top of 
the cradle, bent over anxiously toward the little 
bald head of the new baby. No one spoke for 
at least a minute, which was evidently long enough 
for Miss Little Sister to deliver her message, for 
at the end of that time, away flew Liza across the 
room like a little sunbeam, dancing and singing, 

“ I know a secret I won’t tell you. 

Sister told me and it is true.” 

No amount of begging on the part of Martha 
Mary could persuade Liza to tell what the little 
stranger had said. I am sorry to say that Mary 


THE NEWS THAT L. H. D. BROUGHT 171 

felt just the least bit jealous, for she didn’t see 
why Liza should be the only person in the family 
to know such wonderful things. Just as the two 
children were leaving the room, Liza went over to 
the big bed, took Mother Dear’s hand and 
kissed it. 

“ Baby says her name’s ‘ Midge,’ ” said But- 
terfly. “ That is part of the secret.” 

Everyone smiled and was glad. 

“Well,” said Father, “Midge it shall be, al- 
though her really, truly name is to be ‘ Mar- 
garet,’ just hke Mother’s.” 

Liza’s eyes fairly danced with delight at the 
news, and Martha Mary had to keep a very tight 
hold on her lips, so as not to shout how happy she 
was, and so awaken Miss Midge. 

No one could seem to eat any breakfast that 
morning, though there were delicious berries from 
the garden, with mush, and new-laid eggs, and 
the thickest cream that Cow Bess could give. 
The boys had been introduced to Miss Margaret 
Sherman, the second, while Liza and Martha 
Mary were dressing, so it was small wonder that 
with the new addition to the family to discuss the 


in LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

importance of such an everyday occurrence as 
breakfast faded to almost nothing. 

“ She’s not so much,” said Walter, with a rather 
disgusted look, while he balanced a raspberry 
on the end of his fork. “ Little bit of a red thing 
without any hair at all! and, do you know, it 
hasn’t even a single tooth.” 

“ Well, supposing it hasn’t,” said John, his 
pride very much hurt at the idea of a sister of 
his not being perfect, “ it’s much happier without 
them, I’m sure. Doesn’t have to bother with any 
old dentist.” 

“John! Walter! How can you?” said Mar- 
tha Mary, almost in tears. “ You are simply 
hateful to talk like that about the loveliest baby 
there ever was. You ask Miss Mason if she 
isn’t. I heard her tell Father that Midge was a 
‘ perfectly normal child,’ and although it sounds 
awful, he looked so happy that I know it must 
be something nice.” 

“ But where did she come from, my Sister 
Midge Margaret?” said Liza, who had been per- 
fectly still ever since she had left Mother Dear’s 
room. No one knew, but Edward Lee suggested 


THE NEWS THAT L. H. D. BROUGHT 173 

that they find Flip, and perhaps he could tell 
them. So away they all scampered, but not a 
trace of him could they find. Just as they were 
about to give up, Liza spied him way down in 
the sunken garden, his arms full of baby roses 
which he had gathered for the baby in the house 
who looked so like a rose herself. The children 
had never before seen him look so happy, except 
the day that Jane came and his book was accepted. 
So, of course, they knew it would be easy to get 
him to tell a story. Martha Mary took his hand 
and patted it and said: 

“ Please, Flip, we would like a really and truly 
story about Margaret.” Flip was delighted and 
said he had intended to tell one, anyway, and 
was coming to look for them. 

“ For,” said he, “ I am very, very happy to- 
day, Ladykin Dear, so you shall have the nicest 
story I know how to tell.” 

And this is what he told them — the story of 
Little Sister Margaret: 

“ Did you ever wonder. Children,” he began, 
“ when you look at the sky at night, and see the 
millions of fairy stars twinkling and dancing up 


174f LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 

there, just why they are so bright and happy? 
Well, I’ll tell you the reason. It is the most 
wonder fullest secret there ever was, and the only 
people who are allowed to know it are the ones 
who love the star-children very much.” 

“I do,” said Liza. “Please tell me!” 

“ Me, too — and Me — and Me — and Me,” came 
in chorus from the others. 

“ Now,” Flip continued, “ you all know that 
everybody and everything in the world must have 
some use, no matter how little it may be. It is 
just the same in Star-land, though most silly 
people never think what the little twinkling lights 
are for. Do you know that every single one of 
them, down to the teeniest, tiniest baby, that you 
can hardly see, is a world of loveliness all by 
itself? There is the Rose Star, where gloriously 
deep red roses, and little shy yellow buds and 
pink lady-roses grow, and the air is sweeter than 
the sweetest perfume you can imagine. Then 
there is the Forget-me-not Star, all covered with 
the little blue flowers that look like Sister Mar- 
garet’s eyes; and the Violet Star, and Pansy 
Land, and Sun Flower Place (very large and im- 


THE NEWS THAT L. H. D. BROUGHT 175 

portant) and heaps and heaps of other flower 
stars whose names I have forgotten. Of course 
there is Fairy Story Star, too, where Puss in 
Boots, and Little Red Riding Hood, and Cinder- 
ella, and Jack the Giant Killer, and all the rest of 
them live. Right near IT is the Grown-Up Book 
Star, where there are so very many people that 
they never get time to know each other. But the 
most important star, outside, of course, of the 
Music Land Star and the Bird Star where the 
loveliest of songs come from, and really, even 
more important than them, is — ^guess who! But- 
terfly Dear! ” 

^‘Lady Rumdidoodledum,” said Liza, without 
even stopping to think. 

“ Right,” said Flip, ‘‘ and that is just whom I 
am going to tell you about.” 

“ But I thought it was to be about baby sister,” 
said Martha Mary, rather disappointedly, for 
she really could think of nothing else this morn- 
ing. 

“ It is about them both. Impatient,” answered 
Flip. 

‘‘ You see, since Lady Rumdidoodledum is the 


176 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


biggest and brightest and happiest star of them 
all, she must of course have something very nice 
to make her so glad. Now, what do you sup- 
pose it would be that is even lovelier than all the 
loveliest flowers or books, or birds, or anything 
else that you can think of ? ” 

“ Give up,” said Walter, although everyone 
was much too busy listening to Flip to pay any 
attention. 

“ I know,” said Martha Mary, her eyes shin- 
ing. “ It’s Babies.” 

“ Exactly, Ladykin Dear,” answered Flip. 
“Lady Rumdidoodledum is the Baby Star, and 
she shines specially for little children all over 
the world. I must tell you about her. There are 
oodles and oodles of babies living there, creeping 
and laughing and cooing all day. They are 
happy as happy can be, for they have the most 
adorable little playmates that you ever saw. 
They are little fairy creatures, scarcely as large 
as Martha Mary’s flnger-nails, and they live in the 
soft, silky green centers of eucalyptus blossoms. 
When a Mother down here on the earth wants a 
little boy child or girl child very badly, she 


THE NEWS THAT L. H. D. BROUGHT 177 

goes out into the woods and picks a eucalyptus 
blossom. Then, if she is very wise she opens it, 
whispers her wish, and lets out the tiny creature 
inside, who flies away up beyond the clouds in 
the gentle arms of the Southeast wind, straight 
to Lady Rumdidoodledum. There, the first thing 
the little fairy-person sees is a big silver cloud. 
She goes right through it, for she is both a fairy 
and a dream and can do many wonderful things. 
Right there, who do you think is waiting? A 
smiling Mother-person who looks like your Mother 
Dear, as well as every other Mother in the world. 

“ ‘ Happy Day, Little Dream,’ she says, which 
is Rumdidoodledum for ‘How do you do?’ The 
little creature whispers the message of the Mother 
who sent her from earth, then flies back to 
tell her that all is well, and her wish will be 
granted. 

“ Well, one lovely evening, several months ago, 
just after the sun had set and the sky was all 
rosy and gold in the west, your Mother Dear 
went out for a little walk in the garden with 
Father. Lady Rumdidoodledum had just come 
out and was shining very brightly over the top 


178 LADY RUMDIDOODLEDUM’S CHILDREN 


of the big eucalyptus tree. Mother Dear saw her 
first; she always does, you know. So, she wished 
very, very hard for another little daughter, at 
the same time opening the eucalyptus blossom 
that she held in her hand. There was a little 
breeze at that moment, and away flew the tiny 
creature. When she reached the Baby Star, she 
stayed a very, very long time indeed. For she 
was most particular for so small a personage and 
wished to find just the very sweetest of all the 
Rumdidoodledum babies to be Margaret Sher- 
man. So she searched and searched but none of 
them suited exactly, until way off in a corner she 
found what she was looking for: an adorable 
little golden-haired mite with eyes that danced 
and were the color of forget-me-nots. Then the 
fairy person knew that she had found the right 
little sister for John, Martha Mary, Walter and 
Edward Lee and Liza, so she flew off, happy as 
happy could be. 

“ Ever since. Mother Dear has been waiting, 
waiting for her dream to come true. This morn- 
ing, just as Lady Rumdidoodledum was fading 
from the sky, the Baby-person arrived, for all 


THE NEWS THAT L. H. D. BROUGHT 179 

the world as lovely and pink as the dawn that 
brought her. 

“ That, Butterfly Dear, is the story of Little 
Sister Margaret, the dearest of all Lady Rum- 
didoodledum’s children. And that, you see, is the 
reason that Mr. Cock Robin sang so happily out- 
side your window this morning and the flowers 
were all so gay and the sky so blue and bright. 
You see, all the world is happy at the sound of 
a baby’s voice. 

“ Listen, there she is, calling now, for someone 
to come and love her.” 

“ I do,” said Butterfly Liza. “ And I — and I — 
and I — and I,” sang all the others. 


FINIS 


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